#but also my head is killing me and i already took too much meds

[leagueofdccm]

//. lmao, so my migraines are currently fucking me up; still tired from the party last night, lmao. I'm only up cause #kids. BUT--- eventually, imma work on my card, and I need to make a list of characters I am no longer using and the muses I am adding.

Adding ( reminder ) more so for me :

Black Noir II ( THE BOYS ) Ryan Butcher ( THE BOYS ) Marie Moreau ( GEN V ) Hughie Campbell ( lowkey & private ) ( THE BOYS ) Ramsay Bolton ( GOT )

Muses I am getting rid of : Tiffany ( chucky series ) Chucky ( chucky series ) Joel ( Last of us ) Sabrina ( caos ) nick ( caos ) daryl dixon ( twd )

[mind-intheclouds342]

Do it for them - Co-captain reader x Curly

Part 4 - Part 5

You heard footsteps approaching, which made you wake up immediately, but when you felt hands on your shoulders, that's when you opened your eyes.

When you saw Jimmy sitting on your bed with his hands on your shoulders, you were surprised, although he also looked surprised to see you awake.

Jimmy: "Captain... I need to tell you something."

"...Is it so important that you had to wake me up in the middle of the nigth?..."

You sat down and turned on the light to see his face clearly, you didn't feel comfortable at all in this situation.

Jimmy: "I was thinking if we open the cargo, maybe we can find something useful there or gain access to some part of the ship that could help us-"

"Couldn't that really wait until morning? Did you have to come into my room?"

He opened his mouth to say something, but no words came out, he just took your hands and bowed his head, avoiding your gaze.

Jimmy: "I want to be helpful..."

You pulled your hands away from his and patted his head a couple of times.

"Alright, but let's wait until tomorrow, go get some rest, it's not good for you to be awake at this hours."

He nodded with his head still down and got up to leave your room, but you stopped him at the door.

"How... Is Curly doing?"

Jimmy: "Haven't you asked Anya?"

"She always tells me the same thing... I need to know his condition, I don't want to cling to false hope."

Jimmy: "Of course, she's going to tell you it's fine... Do you want the truth?"

You nodded at his question, preparing for the worst.

Jimmy: "I don't think he can hold on much longer, he's agonizing in the state he's in, his body is useless, he can't move, he can't speak, he can't even open his mouth on his own and can barely swallow. It's a dying dog waiting to be euthanized."

You covered your mouth upon hearing that, the harsh reality your husband was suffering.

You jumped out of bed and grabbed him by his uniform.

"You know the code, you can go see him. Take me there now!"

Jimmy: "I can't, the captain hasn't authorized it yet."

"He can't speak! Can't move! With that logic, I'll never be able to see him! It's an order!"

The man looked at you in silence and with seriousness, soon you let go of his uniform and ran your hands through your hair.

Jimmy: "Just imagine that he's already dead, maybe that way you can work with a cool head, captain."

Those were his last words before leaving your room.

You looked at your empty bed for a few seconds before sitting on it.

"He... is dead... like the cat of Schrödinger..."

You sighed and turned off the lights, trying to go back to sleep, too tired to keep thinking or to notice the unbuttoned buttons on your shirt.

Swansea: "No way, they told us to stay away from the cargo, it's completely forbidden."

"Do those rules really matter right now? Maybe we'll find something there."

Anya: "Maybe there are meds... We are running low..."

Daisuke: "It's not going to kill us to take a look!"

"Here we go"

You sighed as you headed to the cargo hold, the entire crew following you. You entered the code to open the door, and it slowly opened, revealing its contents.

You ventured into it, ignoring the boxes scattered around, more interested in finding something useful to bring you back to Earth while the others checked the cargo.

A light caught your attention, and you could see that there was a screen showing the ship's trajectory; there was a warning alert because they were moving away from the delivery zone. 

You looked closely and tried to figure out where they were going, your face lit up for a moment when you realized they were heading to one of the Pony Express stations.

You did the calculations to figure out how much they would reach.

That place was like a service station, where they could stop if they had any issues with the crew or the ship, but normally it was much faster to make the delivery than to go to one of these, which were too far from the delivery points.

"Maybe the asteroid changed our route and brought us closer to the station before the delivery point... Making the autopilot take us directly there... three months! In three months, we'll be there!"

You gave a small jump, excited about what you had discovered, soon going to the others to be able to inform them.

But just as you were about to reach them, there was a collapse of boxes in the aisle you were passing through.

You could hear their screams and how they called you, you felt a great weight on your body and it was extremely painful, your chest was crushed and you couldn't breathe.

You knew very well that those boxes were strategically placed to avoid damage, so you were sure that someone intervened to make them fall that way.

You let out a sigh, immediately spitting blood, trying to pull your hand out from between the boxes and the mouthwashes on you.

Until you were left with your hand raised and your eyes closed.

.

.

.

.

.

You jumped up with your breath quickened and clutched your stomach as you felt a sharp pain.

"I'm going to kill him"

You didn't take another second to get out of bed, clutching your stomach feeling the pain, but your anger was bigger.

When you were about to leave the nurseary, you heard a groan.

You slowly turned to see that man, or what was left of him, lying on that table.

[corrieguards]

Cody x reader Summary: Cody's in a sour mood, injured both in pride and flesh. So when a cute medic comes to check up on him, they are faced with one grumpy Cody. Word Count: 1,9k T/W: none, just Cody being a little shit

Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3

Today had not been a good day for Cody.

His first misfortune of the day happened when General Kenobi was transferred over to reinforce another battalion, right in the middle of his own raging battle. Not only that but he also took both his medics along with him, leaving Cody as the sole commander of 600 men, some of them seriously injured.

To make matters worse, when he sent a request for backup, the Council replied by dispatching the only other available battalion. And when the gun ships arrived, a relieved Cody rushing to meet them as they landed, who did he see stroll out of them?

Anakin fucking Skywalker. 

Hopes crushed, he reluctantly began to brief the general on the current situation and offer up some of his own opinions on counter attacks only for Anakin to dismiss them. Plans he has spent all kriffing night making replaced with another one of Skywalkers idiotic ideas that was probably going to get them killed.

Then, to add salt to the wound, half way through the battle he got caught in the crossfire of a thermal detonator that some shiny had accidentally thrown too close to him. Not only did he get thrown across the room, but a piece of shrapnel hit him in just the right spot between his armour platings, getting firmly and painfully lodged into his side.

So here he now sat, safely in hyperspace on the way back to the capital. His dignity wounded not only by the fact that Anakins' stupid plan had actually worked, but also because he, Marshal Commander Cody, had got wounded in battle. And not by a clanker or a seppie, no. By a fucking shiny.

All he wanted to do now was take a weeks long nap, but instead he was stuck in the med-bay of the Resolute waiting impatiently for a medic to show up. But apparently even the medics of the 501st were horribly unorganized.

Scowling at the time display on his wrist comm, he scoffed, already itching to get up and leave. Maker, how much longer was this going to take?

He didn’t even need to be here for kriff sake, he was fine. He still had piles of reports to sign off and injured men to check up on. But Rex had made him promise that he would at least let one of his medics take a look at him and Cody was nothing if not a man of his word.

Sensing a movement out the corner of his eye he turned lazily towards the door a bored look on his face.

“Hi, I’m here to be your medic” you smiled as you made your way over to your patient.

“Fucking finally” he muttered under his breath. Your head shot up from your datapad, raising an eyebrow at the trooper in front of you. What was his problem?

Brushing the comment off you plastered on another smile, admittedly less genuine that the first one.

“Ok then, let’s get started shall we?”, you introduced yourself to him, telling him your name and finishing it off by offering him a handshake.

He glanced down at your outstretched hand then back up at you face, eyebrows raising before slowly accepting your offer. His hand engulfed your own as he gave it a small shake, pulling back almost as soon as your hands had touched.

A couple beats of silence passed as you looked at him expectantly. His frown deepened “We gonna get this over with or what?

Your eyes widened, taken aback by his bluntness. Seriously, what was this guy's problem?

“I was waiting for your name...” you said, but this only made him look even more confused.

“Y’know, I tell you my name, you tell me yours…” you explained hesitantly “at least that’s how introductions usually work.”

“I know how they work” he scoffed “I just assumed you already knew who I was. Most people do.”

“Oh. Well I’m kinda new around here. I haven’t even really worked with other battalions outside of the 501st yet”

“Clearly.” he grumbled “The name’s Cody. Marshal Commander Cody.”

Ok so he was definitely wayy to full of himself.

You flashed him an awkward smile “Ok then Cody, how about you lay down for me and we can get started?”

Turning, you started rummaging through ypu med pack when he scoffed, making you look up abruptly only to find him still sitting on the edge of the bed with a bored look on his face.

"How long is this going to take?" he asked harshly.

"Well, that really depends on how bad your injuries are commander, I-"

"Great" he cut you off "then I believe we're finished here” He jumped of the bed, wincing slightly and clutching his side but quickly recovering and playing it off

You caught the movement and opened your mouth, beginning to protest “But commander, you're obviously injured-“

“I’m perfectly fine” he said, pointedly cutting you off yet again “Now if you’d just sign me off I’ll be on my way.”

He held his hand out expectantly, already looking down at his comm as he waited for you to hand him the med report card.

This guy was getting on your last kriffing nerve.

When you didn’t react he slowly looked up at your face “I said-“

“I know what you said” this time you cut him off. He raised an eyebrow at you before straightening up to his whole height and taking a step closer to you.

“Good, then how about you follow orders and hand me that report card, medic”

Oh so this is how this was gonna go. Ok then, two can play that game Cody.

Matching him you took a step closer, now almost chest to chest “I don’t care if you’re Marshal Commander or the fucking Chancellor, when it comes to medical care I outrank you”

He looked taken aback by your outburst but maintained his firm gaze nonetheless. Refusing to back down you glared straight back up at him. Eventually he scoffed “Fine, but make it quick.”

“It will take as long as it needs to take Commander," you replied snarkily “Now please if you would be so kind as to lay down.”

He let out a small huff of disbelief, but settled back down onto the bed anyway. You had balls he’d give you that.

“Not many people talk to me like that y’know” he said as he watched you set up your supplies.

“Yeah? Well maybe they should” you scoffed, making him narrow his eyes at you.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You seem like you could be taken down a couple notches is all." You shrugged, gentle hand begining to detach the armour plating covering his chest and stomach. Then as an after thought you added “No offense.”

“How the hell is that not offensive?”

You smirked, an odd satisfaction at getting under his skin.

He sucked in a sharp breath as you carefully peeled up his blacks, your own breath hitching as it revealed the wound hidden underneath.

“And you said you were fine?”

“I am fine” he replied through his teeth. “Minor wounds are an occupational hazard. I’ll live.”

“Cody. This isn’t a ‘minor injury’. This is an open wound that, if not treated correctly will get worse”

“S’nothing I haven’t dealt with before”

“I don’t care if you’ve dealt with it before, right now it’s my job to take care of you and you’ve got to let me do it”

He shot you an annoyed look but settled down nonetheless “Fine”

You nodded satisfied and walked over to the sink, Cody’s eyes following your every move as you picked up a cloth, letting it soak completly under the tap before carefully wringing it out.

Turning around, you jumped slightly upon seeing the commanders gaze watching you intently. You cleared your throat, walking back over to him and taking a seat on the stool next to the bed. Gently, you pressed the cloth to his skin but quickly pulled it back when he hissed. 

“Sorry” you mumbled “Is it too hot? Too cold?”

“No, no it’s fine, just stings a little”

Nodding you carried on rubbing of the dried blood and dirt spread around his wound, making a conscious effort to be as soft as you could. Once you were satisfied you lent in, taking a closer look at the now clean wound. You hummed and began rummaging in your med pack as he watched you closely.

“What? What is it?” he asked almost as if he was... nervous? No, it couldn’t be.

“It’s just gonna need a couple stitches that’s all, nothing to worry about”

He swallowed as you carefully threaded your needle and lined it up near the start of his cut. Taking one last glance up at him to make sure he was ok you found him clenching his fists tightly by his side, eyes firmly shut and chest rising and falling quickly. 

Who knew he would be so nervous about a tiny needle. You shook your head smiling softly at his nervousness before slowly pushing the needle in. Immediately he flinched, sucking in a breath and clenching his jaw. 

You stilled, glancing up at him again “Hold still for me please.”

“I’m trying” he muttered angrily, “but you’re fucking stabbing me”

You chuckled, focusing back on your work “On come on now, I thought you were ‘big tough Marshal Commander Cody’. People won’t find you nearly as intimidating when they find out you can’t handle a little needle and threat”

“I can handle it.” he growled. 

“Sure doesn’t seem like it” you smirked finishing up the last stitch and tying a careful knot. “But no need to worry Cody, I wouldn’t dare tarnish your reputation like that”.

Taking out a bacta patch you ripped the wrapping off.

“It can be our little secret” you teased, sending him a wink. He rolled his eyes at you, only making you smirk wider when you saw him trying to hide a smile. Huh, maybe he wasn’t so bad after all.

You lined the bacta patch up, before giving him a warning “This is gonna sting a little”

He grunted, squeezing his eyes shut as you pushed it down, looking up at him apologetically and muttering a quiet “Sorry”

Finally you straightened up, dusting off your hands “Okay the Cody, you’re as good as new” 

He groaned as he sat up, watching you fill out the report card before finally signing it off and handing it to him. He took it from you muttering out a quiet “Thanks”

Smirking, you put a hand behind your ear teasingly  “Sorry? I didn’t quite catch that”

He rolled his eyes at you, ghost of a smile gracing his lips “I said” he enunciated each word carefully “Thank you”

“My pleasure Marshal Commander” you grinned, giving him an exaggerated bow. He let out a small huff that sounded suspiciously like a laugh before re-attaching his armour and heading towards the exit.

“Oh and Commander” you shouted when he was half way out the door. He hummed, turning to look at you.

“I’ll see you around Cody” you winked playfully. He shook his head, rolling his eyes but not trying to hide the smile rising on his face.

“Sure, I'll see you around” he replied, winking back before slipping out the door.

You stood, staring dumbly at the empty space where he’d just been standing, feeling a blush slowly creep up to your cheeks.

Did- did he just wink at you?

---

Pt.2 here

A/N: I can't shake the feeling that I didn't get Cody quite right in this? Idk something just feels off. So please feel free to send me some constructive criticism. Key word being constructive. I will most definitely cry if you are mean to me lmao

Anywho, hope y'all enjoyed it anyways ❤️ :D

my masterlist

[daengtokki]

Your story is like the first one I’ve been so deeply captivated by when it comes to serial killer shit, like I can’t explain it. Sure I’ve read yandares and silly ghost face skz story’s, but this one made me feel…disgusted? Like I’ve never had a fictional story about skz make me feel so grossed out. I don’t want you to take it as a negative thing, and if you do i apologize 🩷

I’ve read sooooo many fics through three years and I was a little bit skeptical when I first read the “serial killer! Seungmin” but I’m glad I kept reading cause I’m so excited for the next part.

What I meant by the “it grossed me out” part, is the scene where he killed the man? I don’t know why but I dead ass almost threw up, might be cause I’m sick and the only thing I’ve been consuming are medications. But holy fuck dude, I had to step away😭

Also!! I got so, frustrated? And confused? When she DIDNT LEAVE THE COUNTRY!? A MAN JUST KILLED YOU FOR LIKE TWO MINUTES AND YOURE OVER HERE KISSING HIS LIPS AND WHAT NOT.

But I think that’s what makes a story good! The minute a fic I’m reading is making me feel some kind of emotions, better bet I’m reading until the fkn end.

Anyway, pardon my rant, and again I really hope you don’t take it as offensive, but if you do I’d totally get it tbh.

Stay safe and healthy! Lots of love🩷🌺

Sorry I took so long responding, but I really had to gather my thoughts for this one. Apologies for it being so long and for me basically taking an opportunity to unload.

All of the "negative" parts popped out because I was so tired and out of it. And I was like “oh no please don’t hate please don’t hate the story” 😭 ㅋㅋ ㅋ I'm out of it today, too, so hopefully I type this up properly.

But I don’t take your comments negatively! My job as a writer is to make you feel all of the emotions my characters are dealing with.

So thank you for taking the time to write all of this out! Seriously. I'm a little floored anyone (this goes for everyone who has sent a message or left a long comment about the fic) has been reading thoughtfully enough to catch everything l've been putting into the story. We’ll be getting more into readers fucked up head very soon, since you mentioned that!

I’m glad these not so pretty parts have gotten a reaction out of you, because I’ll take that as me writing the scenes well! That’s very important to me as a writer, and as someone who has always taken writing seriously. I love writing simple fanfic that you guys can lose yourself in, because that’s why I picked up ff again after stopping for many years. And because of Seungmin, ofc. But this is also why I was very nervous about posting DEITY even though I’ve been wanting to do serial killer!Seungmin for months now. I knew it couldn’t be simple, but I had no idea it would already be this long halfway through (almost 50k words). After writing the intro and getting into the first part, I decided to just write an entire novel. I already had the plot in my head.

I don’t see many stories like this on tumblr, but I also don’t read much (I’m not exaggerating when I say all of my free time is spent writing) so putting something darker out there that wasn’t just oneshot smut was a little scary. I’m aware that’s what get most of the attention on here (short stuff, ott smut, ~imagines, etc) and why even though I have readers like you, I don’t have much in the way of likes and reblogs. It does get discouraging, but I’m pushed forward when I think about all of you reading each part.

So ANYWAY. Sorry this got so long. Thank you so much for your reblogs and your comments on those reblogs. It’s so important to me and the other writers on tumblr.

And thank you Seungmin for being my muse. I wouldn’t be writing every day again without you making me so delusional.

Again, sorry if this is too much and none of it makes sense. I took too much of one of my meds today and I’m very dizzy and lethargic from it.

[braveclementine]

Day 36

Warnings: None, Readers under 18 can read this book.

Copyright: My OCs are Coach Yonce, Emma, Ila, Tempus, and Itty Bitty. I own these characters. I do not condone any copying of this.

EXCERPTS FROM SEBASTIAN STANS JOURNAL

EVIDENCE FOR RUSSO TRIAL

JOURNAL ENTRY SEVEN:

Today was nerve racking. They went through with the rape. I heard her ask him to stop, but didn't enter the room until she screamed for me. I felt disgusted with myself for waiting so long. I'm trying so hard not to raise suspicion, but it felt so good to punch that man's face in.

Luckily, he hadn't even gotten her pants off of her, which relieved me greatly. I kissed her and I know I'm in love with her. I didn't mean to, I really didn't, but I do. I love her.

She had gotten rid of the nose chain. I preferred her face without it. She looked beautiful like this, and I told her so. Her eyes shone when I told her and she admitted she'd hated it to. I knew she had been uncomfortable with it on day one.

I kissed her again. I would write about her lips, but I want to keep that private in my head. And besides, this is more an account on the deaths, in case I don't make it out of this alive.

That's a scary thought.

I did try not letting her know that I wanted a future with her if we got out of here. It didn't seem realistic. She's so young, only nineteen. And I'm thirty-two. Not to mention I'd have to figure this out with Margarita. And the whole of the world would hate it.

But I don't care. I don't think I'm going to ever act after this.

I can't. They'll have to get a new actor for Bucky Barnes.

I'll never be able to act again. I'll always doubt what is going on.

If we get out of this alive.

JOURNAL ENTRY EIGHT:

Tempus made Y/N play through all the games. She nearly died- twice. The fact she's still alive both electrifies me and impresses me. God, but I bet she's in so much pain.

In the last round they brought in someone who I guess her friend was in her past. Y/N didn't even look surprised her friend decided to kill her over her other friend. Y/N actually thanked her.

I was on the edge of my seat until she disarmed her friend- getting herself shot in the process.

I took her back to her room. I sewed up the wound myself. I was getting better at having a tougher stomach during these things. Luckily, the bullet only grazed her.

Tomorrow we all get to leave. I'm thinking something bad happened to Henry, or maybe the police can't find us, I don't know. Or maybe we're already surrounded but they can't get in.

Tomorrow is supposed to be the scene where the Avengers break in and save the rest of the kids. I don't know how it'll actually play out. The others aren't ready, they'll fake fight like they're supposed to do.

I keep kissing Y/N. I feel like we're both going to die. It makes me wonder about my real feelings about her. If it's because of where we are, or if I truly do like her in that way.

She does keep talking about after this place. She was talking about a YouTuber that she'd introduce his videos to me. I can't answer because I don't know about after. I think she picked up on it too because she went quiet after that and then went to sleep immediately after I gave her the pain meds.

I don't want to play with her feelings. I really don't. Not after all of this. But I don't know how to not mess with her feelings when I don't know mine.

Or if we'll even be alive by tomorrow night.

JOURNAL ENTRY NINE:

I don't know where Y/N is. The others came today and she killed Tempus. Tempus had killed everyone but her and her three friends. She was going to kill Y/N, but Y/N didn't let that happen.

Y/N really had no idea who I was before this. I could see recognition in her eyes once the others came in, the other actors. I saw the hurt there too and also betrayal.

I wanted to go to her side, but she turned the gun on me. I hated seeing her cry. She looked broken and hurt. Told me to stay the hell away form her.

I think I now realize my feelings were legit. Those couple words from her felt like a stab wound to the heart.

She continued speaking, and her words told me that she thought I thought all of it was fake. That her cut off pinky wasn't enough proof that this was all real. I wanted to tell her I believed it was real. That I did think it was real. That I knew it was real.

She accused me of playing with her feelings while I let children die around us. And fuck, I knew she was right.

I called for the Russo brothers, trying to pretend her words hadn't hurt. They came, they admitted to letting Tempus take over for money. There was almost a billion dollars they were going to get paid for this game.

Then Y/N got the others out of there. She looked at me and I could barely hold her eyes because it hurt so much to see the betrayal in her eyes. She threw the gun at my feet and I can still hear the words in my head. 'It was real to me. Fuck you Stan.'

I wanted to tell her it was real to me too. I didn't want her to spit my last name out at me like it was poison. I had really liked my name falling from her lips.

Now, I'm sitting on the bus that had brought the other actors in, writing this. Downey, Evans, and Hemsworth had jumped the brothers. Hiddleston and Mackie slugged them across the face until they were knocked out.

We had to spend another couple of hours there with the police. They never brought back Y/N or the other girls. I knew we were in the middle of Death Valley, California. If they ran the wrong way. . .

They promised to put out searches for the girls. I hope they find them. Even if Y/N never wants to even look at me again, as long as she's okay and alive, that's all I care about right now.

The others tried speaking to me. Some of them are still trying to speak to me. Johansson can't shut up, trying to be sympathetic about everything I had to go through. But I was treated fine. I'm not the one dead. I'm not the one with my pinky cut off. I'm not the one that was almost raped. But they're treating me like the victim.

Well, Downey, Cumberbatch, and Hiddleston aren't. Downey has been on the phone for ages. I don't know who he's calling, but he's angry.

Evans got me a phone so I could call Margarita. Still haven't. Can't bring myself to.

God, please bring Y/N in safely. Please.

⬅️➡️

[writersmorgue]

Day 28 - you're safe now

Day 25 on Ao3

Day 28 on Ao3

word count: 1048

TWs in tags

note: this is a continuation of day 25! I recommend reading that one before this. Thank you for bearing with me this month! Proud to say I completed my second year of Febuwhump <3

╞╪╪╪╪╪╪╪╪╪╪╪╪╪╪╪╪╡

Katsuki awakes to darkness. 

Godsfucking- another escape nightmare. He shifts, adjusting himself in his restraints. 

“Katsuki?”

“Wait, son-”

“No- you promised you wouldn’t touch my parents!” He growls, arms flexing where they’re strapped to the… bed?

Since when did he get a bed?

The blindfold is removed from his face, revealed to be fluffy gauze taped over his eyes. 

He squints, head jerking backward, “Wh-”

A figure comes into view, out of focus and way too close. “Hey, fuckin’ get away, asshole.” 

“Katsuki, you’re in the hospital baby.” The woman, his mother, says softly. Definitely Toga, there’s no way his mom would sound like that. 

The straps holding him down release altogether, and he pops his quirk a few times. 

“Now hold on, they’re going to re-strap you if you do that.” A man says from his side. 

He turns his head, blinking as everything begins to focus, “Dad?”

“Gosh brat, your hair got so long. They stuck you in a fuckin’ ponytail.”

Well the league doesn’t have two Togas which means maybe-

“Katsuki, brat, you’re at UA. You came back two days ago in the middle of the godsdamn night.” His mother sniffs, dabbing a tissue to her eyes. “An’ If you ever bring this up again we’ll fuckin’ bury you again and we’re not undoing it this time.”

She lunges forward, managing to not activate Katsuki’s fight or flight in a way only his mother could. 

Shit, he really is home. 

“Wait,” He frowns as she digs her face into his shoulder, “it’s been two days?”

His dad nods, looking teary-eyed, “Yeah, you slept a long time, bud.”

“Well, after they pumped you full of meds,” His mom snorts, leaning back and wiping Katsuki’s face where she probably got him all gross and snotty. Eugh, emotions. 

“Right,” He mumbles, examining the room for the first time since he woke, “What day is it?”

“Sunday, October 12th. You’ve been gone awhile, Kat.” Masaru smiles sadly, “Izuku was so worried about you he forgot his own birthday.”

Katsuki hums, “Speaking of the nerd, Is everyone ok? I don’t remember much about when they took me, but I know I was out with fr- classmates.”

“Yet another reason why I’m never letting you out of my sight again, Bakugo.” A deep voice comes from the doorway. 

Aizawa’s scruffy face observes him, any emotions carefully hidden under a layer of annoyance, “I’m pretty sure I told you to be safe before you left.”

Katsuki scoffs, “Unlikely.”

“I brought some of your friends if you want to entertain them for a moment.” He gestures to the hallway behind him, where Katsuki can already hear the idiots whispering to each other.

He nods, propping himself onto a pillow. His parents excuse themselves to make room (and probably avoid the noise).

Kirishima flies in first, darting straight to Katsuki’s bed to crush him in a hug. 

“Shitty- Can’t- brEATHE!” He wheezes after a few moments, patting the guy’s back a few times. 

His red eyes are overflowing with emotion when he pulls back, and his sharp teeth are worrying his bottom lip. “Bakugo you have no idea,we thought you were dead man…” The dam breaks and he begins to cry in earnest, “I didn’t know what to do- we didn’t know where you were!”

“BLASTYYYYY!!!!” Another body slams into his side, curly pink hair tickling his cheek when Mina hugs him, “Blasty if you ever do that again I’ll kill you!” She sniffs.

“Awe c’mon, are you all crying?” Katsuki grimaces when Mina grabs his arm, clinging like a small child.

It’s not… unwelcome.

“Sero’s not!” Kaminari chimes, also covered in snot and tears.

Sero nods, waving casually, “I did my crying when you were kidnapped, I’m afraid I can’t get it up anymore.”

Mina nods solemnly, “It’s true, he was a mess.” She stares at him, reaching a manicured hand out to caress his face, “We were really worried, Bakubabe. Kind felt like our fault since we’d been the last to see you, but you said you wanted quiet, and when we went to get you you were gone and-” She sobs, pressing his palm to her forehead. 

“Hey, c’mon horns, I’m here now.”

“Yeah,” She agrees tearily.

Kirishima takes his other hand, staring at the empty space, “Is your hand okay? We knew they sent something, but Aizawa wouldn’t let us see so we assumed it was bad, especially when they said it was pretty likely you were dead.” 

Katsuki shrugs, tugging his hand away softly, “It’s not infected if that’s what you mean. It just feels weird, like it’s still there but it’s not. It’ll take some getting used to, but my quirk still works fine.”

“Are you coming back to class soon?” Sero asks, sitting on the edge of his bed with Kaminari.

“I dunno, probably just for the boring stuff ‘til I gain some weight back. Lost all my progress.” He grumbles, staring at his noodle arm with disdain, “It’ll be back to normal soon, and the next time I see Toga I can punch her fuckin’ teeth in.”

“That’s the spirit!” Mina cheers.

Denki smiles sadly, picking at the ratty hospital blanket, “I’m really glad you’re back, dude, we were- it was really rough.”

The rest of them nod, and Katsuki can only feel so tired before he just collapses. 

“Well, I want a fuckin’ nap.”

“Oh!” Kirishima nods, standing, “Right, we can come back la-”

“So you guys better fuckin’ get comfortable, cuz I ain’t movin’.” He grins, sinking back into his pillow expectantly. 

Mina’s black eyes go wide, “You mean-”

“I ain’t fuckin’ sayin’ it.”

“SQUAD CUDDLE!!!” Denki shouts, leaping onto Katsuki’s legs and curling up like a cat. 

There are only so many people you can fit on a hospital bed, but somehow they make it work. 

Mina curls up to his side, Kirishima on his chest, Sero on his other side, and Kaminari by his legs. He’s completely surrounded by the people he cares about most. 

He doesn’t even care if it’s a dream anymore, this is the happiest he’s been. 

Kirishima nuzzles into his chest, grunting sleepily. Katsuki lets his eyes slip shut, and he doesn’t even bother yelling when his parents sneak in to take pictures.

Yeah, he's finally safe.

[fictionkinfessions]

Been watching the Markiplier Until Dawn playthrough again and just like back in 2016, I still kin Josh and very strongly too.

My fucking sisters died, and sure it wasn't completely our friends fault, but also it absolutely fucking was. I cannot believe how you all treated Hannah, or that you let Beth run after her all alone.

Sam, Chris, I expected better of you both. Sam, you were Hannah's best friend, how could you go along with that prank? Chris, you were my best friend. You've known me and my sisters since middle school, there's no way you thought that it would go well, I will never understand why you took part in that.

Mike. Go to hell. You played with my Hannah's feelings the most directly, after us all being friends for years. I blame her death on you. That stupid prank never could have happened without you. I hate you with more passion than anything I've ever felt.

Matt, Em, Jess and Ash, you're all idiots. Your focus on petty drama or being too scared to stand up for your friends caused the death of my sisters.

I'm still so angry, even in my grief I couldn't properly recover due to Dr. Hill. I was already diagnosed with autism, OCD and schizophrenia, but I was handling those well for a teenager. I was medicated, I had a care team and a support group, I had friends who I THOUGHT understood me. Then you all ruined it. You got my sisters killed, the state issued me new grief counseling, my medications changed. That second party was supposed to help me let out all the feelings that built up, to get these new violent thoughts out of my head in a way I felt was "safe". I was supposed to get to play a little prank of my own and get my revenge before moving on. I wasn't in sound mind making that decision, but if it had played out how I wanted no one would have died, no one was ever supposed to die, but instead you all got a taste of the real horror my sisters had to experience because of you.

I hope the guilt still haunts you in this life and that it keeps you from EVER being so cruel to someone again.

Hannah, Beth... I'm so sorry. I drank that night despite taking my meds and I passed out so early that night due to it. If I hadn't drank, maybe I could've saved you. I love you both so much, you were the best sisters I could've ever asked for and I miss you all the time. I love you both, I pray more than anything that you're both happy and safe now

x

[percygranate]

Update: 1 Moth after surgery

Lu had his surgery on September 10th. Today is October 11th.

Yesterday we took him to the animal hospital as he couldn't move, all four of his legs were like butter sliding away underneath him.

The day before we noticed that he was a little off his walking game but thought it was due to the weather. He also cried all night and I wondered if it were just like last week when he cried all night cause the weather got colder, as he always was a bit dramatic.

At the animal hospital the doctor and orthopedist checked him, drew blood, revisited the x-rays.

We already knew that Lu was starting to develop back problems due to being born with a natural misalignment of spine and his which made these two knee injuries happen in the first place, but now the case is that he relied too much on his back to carry himself and ruined his back.

Massive herniated disc right in the center of his back by the rips.

The doctor said we can't operate and have his legs heal fast enough to fix his back and he will rely on heavy-duty pain meds (morphine) to even exist and that will in the long term kill him.

His kidneys and liver are still okay although his kidneys are starting to get bad now.

The two knee surgeries would take us 1 year to heal, then he would need back surgery, and that would take ages to heal—Doctor was honest and called it a bottomless pit that will just cost us insane amounts of money and Lu will only be in pain without any life quality.

There is nothing we can do.

We started crying and the doctor gave Lu a chance to recover saying, “I would've suggested putting him down today, but he is so sweet and I feel so bad for him. I am so sorry,” and gave him two massive shots of drugs and gave us extra pain meds (making it 6.5 to 9 pills a day for Lu to take) and told us if he doesn't recover by Saturday we should “please just let him go.”

The shots were meant to help with all his pain within an hour. When we arrived an hour later at home, Lu managed to walk the tiniest bit by being mostly carried by my boyfriend. Then he lay down on his blankets, with our help, and that's where he stayed put.

He managed to sleep and in his dreams seems to be running like crazy, something he had been doing all night. He must be dreaming of running through fields.

Every time he woke up in between dream, or I woke him up as I don't like him barking and seemingly having bad dreams as he gets upset, he just looked in so much pain. So those two big shots that are heavy-duty aren't even helping much anymore.

My boyfriend and I talked a long while about what to do. We cried. We lay on the floor with Lu like we would do sometimes out of a whim or when he was sick or hurt.

We know we gotta let him go and its not fair.

I don't want to, but I don't wanna be selfish when he is in so much pain. I don't wanna force him to just lie there and exist just so I don't have to let him go.

We called the doctor again to set the appointment for today. There is no use of waiting another day. Unless a miracle happens that heals both his knees and back? This is it.

We arranged for Lu to be cremated as he is me fur baby and I have trauma from how easily pets were discarded when I was a kid. I wanna have him placed somewhere nice.

The creating will cost us up to 1k depending on all the extras we want, but its just half the price of his knee surgery, and funerals are expensive, right? Because that's what it is, a funeral. Im preparing.

On the way home Lu had his head on my lap and he kept looking at me like, “whats up? Why are you crying, mom?” and I tried to talk to him and not look upset so he wouldn't feel bad, but it just hurts. It hurts so bad.

When I went to bed Lu started crying cause he usually sleeps in my bedroom with me—when he was healthy he always slept in bed with me, but he lost his ability to jump three months ago when his knee problems started.

He forced himself up and ran after me to the bedroom and for a moment I was like, “Hey! We can turn this around!” but then I saw he walk, his legs numb and unable to really carry him. Then he fell, whimpered, and peed himself in pain.

He just looked so miserable, even an hour later. Just so so miserable.

He didn't move from that spot all night, peed himself some more times as he doesn't seem to really feel it.

Today when I woke up I didn't feel the pain of the loss for a moment. Everything was okay. Then I looked over my bed to check on him just to see he hadn't moved, just laid there flat and miserable.

I went to pet him and he looks partially apathetic and his nose is just so cold.

It all just adds to me knowing I cant do shit. I have tried grasping straws and making excuses of how Luhe will miraculously get better and maybe I can fix it, but I can't. I can't fix this.

I lay on the floor so often the last few hours and apologized. I am so sorry I can’t help Lu.

I kept hoping the bills would end at some point, but not like that. I just wanted him to get better. I thought I did well and cared well for him.

We tried to give him his meds today, as always wrapped in his favorite cold cuts. He usually loves that part of the day cause he loves the cold cuts like crazy—He didn't take them. Later we tried again and he ate one, but he is just too week to eat the rest.

Today at 3 PM is the appointment.

Hey, so I usually don't ever ask people for money, but I am kind of at the end of my abilities and cried too much today to care about it anymore:

My dog, who I rescued in Croatia in 2017 after he was found eating dirt in the forrest, Lu, is turning 8 years old next mont. He is the sweetest and softest fur baby, and look like an ice bear. He never ever has been in a fight with another animal and thinks everyone, no matter the species, is his best friend.

He is also my best friend, and I initially adopted him after starting therapy after moving out of home for Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Agoraphobia, and C-PTSD, which had me not leave the house for years. He is my best friend in fur and helped me to get back out into the world again after it had been nothing but awful to me.

I fixed myself, fixing Lu, when nobody wanted him and nobody wanted me.

For two months now he has been dealing with severe hip and back issues. It started abruptly, with him no longer wanting to play and be on long walk, suddenly struggling to get up, and as something our vet called “just a little muscle inflammation” and a one-week medication treatment that cost us 150€.

Lu felt better for 1 1/2 weeks and even started playing a little again before the pain came back. This time, we paid 100€ for a milder medication as the vet did wanna put him again on those string monster pills he was on before as it would’ve damaged his system. I gave him those pills every day (he, by now, is such good boy at taking them) and he did again better for a 1/2 week without daily medication.

Again, he couldn't get up, started crying at night, is no longer is able to sleep in my bed, no longer lay on his back, and he only lays on the floor, trying not to get up and walk around as he is in pain, he no longer plays… So we went to the vet again.

This time, we paid 80€ for a few of the strong medications he got in the first place. Diagnosis: “Old boy. Arthritis. Inflamed hip.” We were meant to give him two of those pills on days he is struggling more than the by now basic.

Two days ago, I was on a walk with Lu, just leaving my apartment complex, when he collapsed for the first time and fell down in the middle of a crosswalk. There was no chance of him getting up. Car drivers hated us, and I bagged for minutes that he would try getting up.

After I nearly started crying, he finally forced himself up, walked a few meters, and fell again. It was like his hips just couldn't carry him anymore. Watching him to try forcing himself up but struggling so badly is something that kills me every time I see it, but I am used to it by now, sadly.

He finally got up after 30 minutes and we walked home. I gave him his pills and after a nap we ran around pretty well, even the next day he was doing so much better. I should've not thought this was over.

Today my boyfriend took him on a walk. The same thing happened, but this time Lu screamed out in pain first. This time there was no getting up. Even after my boyfriend called me and I ran over in my pajamas as Lu is known to be a mama’s boy.

We called our vet, who told us we needed to go to the animal hospital. The animal hospital told us they would charge us roughly 2500€ for an X-ray and have Lu there overnight and treated.

The secretary from the animal hospital told us we were not allowed to pay it back at monthly rates when we asked.

We asked why it was so expensive; she replied, “We are the only ones doing this in the city, so we can choose our prices as we see fit.”

We asked how other people could afford that, crying in the middle of the street as our dog still lay there, unable to walk or even get up, and she told us, “Everyone can afford that.”

When my boyfriend told her he needed to talk to me about it, she replied, “Yeah, sure. Just call us if you actually need and want our help.”

I am disabled, suffering from Hypermobile Ehlers Danlos Sympton, am in the middle of getting a POTS diagnosis, and have Autism and ADHD. I am physically due to the chronic pain not able to work. I don't have that kind of money to just whip out like it is nothing.

For my boyfriend, this kind of money is more than his monthly loan.

There is no worse feeling than when your pet is in pain and needs to be medically treated, but you can't get them the help they need because YOU do not earn enough.

We cried and tried to get up Lu for an hour before calling my mother, who I am low contact with as she emotionally abused my for decates and is part of the reason I have C-PTSD. She drove us the a Animal Hospital outside the city, as they were the last suggestion our vet could give us and the told us they would charge less for the same kind of help and work.

There, we were prepared to pay the 300€ to have Lu no matter how, even if we needed to/manage to have my mother borrow it to us.

The vet was amazing, seeing the problem the moment Lu finally stood up and walked for the first time.

His hips are fucked, probably the back too, and he has Arthritis. But right now, they can't do any of the X-rays because first his fever and inflammation need to go down.

Today we paid 100€, Lu got a big shot, and for the first big pain and fever, starting tomorrow, he will regularly take two of those initially given strong pills once a day so he hopefully can have the x-rays next week.

My dog was mentally a puppy jumping around like a little deer until this started. He always wanted to play, always ran around and did something. This took all the joy in life for him.

I’m asking for help to pay for the X-ray and whatever treatment will follow for Lu after.

https://www.paypal.me/percygranate

UPDATE:

Today we had the X-Ray appointment and paid 352€

Hips and back are okay.

BOTH OF LU’S KNEES ARE FUCKED.

Cruciate Ligament Rupture & the knee joints are fucked.

The operation will be a two timer and cost us 4000€

I am currently not able to tell you how I am going to pay this. I barely managed to pay the X-rays today.

I amcurrently not even in possession of a life insurance that could help my dog if I kick it. /ifywim

Again:

I am BEGGING, if you have even a euro or dollar or whatever to spare, please help me.

https://www.paypal.me/percygranate

(paypal also uses my deadname, so please ignore that)

[takoichigo]

So I'm at MAGFest.

I didn't do anything today besides pick up my badge and my MAGFest merch. Which nearly fucking killed me. I was extremely dehydrated and at the end of my rope emotionally and it was NOT a good time. And then the guys brought me back lunch, which was a sub. Apparently all the bread at the sub place is absolutely covered with sesame seeds. Like a ludicrous amount of them. But I couldn't like, send it back or not eat it. I can't walk outside in the cold for more than a few steps so my options for food are pretty much limited to what I can get someone to bring me. It tasted good at least, but my insides are going to be incredibly angry when those hit my colon. I can't have seeds or nuts or anything of that nature. I didn't get dinner. They went without me and didn't ask if I wanted them to bring me back anything.

Because I overdid it this morning my body has just shut down, essentially. I have not had any energy to do anything beyond a little tidying. I missed my friend's panel, the one thing I really wanted to go to today. I've basically been in the same position for 10 hours because moving hurts. I've been lying on my stomach. Which is really bad for my elbows, which have been particularly scaly and dry lately, and I also scraped one of them on the stupid textured wall in the bathroom. Intensely painful for no reason other than there are about two positions I can lie in where it doesn't hurt too bad, and one is on my stomach, resting on my elbows. If I'm lucky sometimes I can hit comfortable. At the moment I'm closer to tolerable. I'm trying to go to sleep. My brain isn't having it.

I'm exhausted and not used to sleeping in a room with other people. Especially when one of them snores super loud. Even though this is a person I have shared a bed with several times. They're just loud. It sounds like a buffalo drowning in a mud pit.

Our room neighbors are VERY loud as well. Thankfully it hasn't been an issue while I've been trying to sleep. But they scream at each other instead of conversing. It's annoying, but not unexpected. I'm not gonna cause a fuss over it or anything. People are having fun. I hope they're having a great time. This is a fun event. Unless you have cancer and chemo has crippled you and made your hands and feet useless and stolen all your energy.

I told myself I was going to have fun here. I need to have fun. It is unacceptable for me to just be in this room all weekend. Pain has stolen one day of happiness away from me. It doesn't get to do that for the next three days. If it does I will feel like I have wasted my money, my time, and my energy on doing this, and I'll feel stupid for even thinking I could handle it. I don't want that.

Well my head sure was full of thoughts. This is a genuinely long post. And I could go on even longer about the stupid embarrassing things that have already happened to me. But I won't, because I don't want to think about them anymore. This is enough.

I did have some fun. The hotel TVs show "MAGtv" which is a feed of things that are happening around the fest. I watched three concerts that were happening downstairs and very much enjoyed two of them. They showed two or three panels that I wasn't interested in. They switched to the feed of their charity speedrun for a bit, and a very buff man was juggling things, and every time he dropped one, he'd have to do pushups based on how much had been donated. It was strangely riveting to watch. I enjoyed it.

Anyway, it's going on 2 AM and I took my meds half an hour ago so I should actually feel like sleeping soon. I should have taken them earlier, but I didn't want to miss hanging out with my friends if they came back to the room to chill. Which we did for a while. It was nice. I don't think I made my friend mad about missing his panel. At least I hope I didn't. He still hasn't told me what I did to irritate him. I'm trying to not be a pain. But it's hard. I feel bad that I complained a little about lunch. And also about sideways complaining about them not bringing me dinner. But what can I do? Things are so rarely under my control anymore. Just need to stay as mindful as I can.

Good lord this is a novel. I'm done now, I swear.

[thebibliosphere]

"But you're so successful without it."

Content warning: This post contains mentions of suicidal ideation.

I got a message earlier tonight that I'm not going to post, but I did ask the person involved if I could talk about what we subsequently ended up talking about in DMs because I feel it's important.

Basically, it was along the lines of "My kid got diagnosed with ADHD and really wants to try meds. I know from reading your blog that correct treatment for ADHD can be really beneficial, but I just don't think she's severe enough to need them."

The message then went on to ask me, as someone who is unmedicated with ADHD, for some tricks and tips on how to be successful without medication because clearly, look how well I'm doing without them. I mean, look at my blog, look at my book(s)! Surely if I can do all that without ADHD meds, other people can too. Surely there's a trick. A skill. Something you can learn if you just try hard enough...

This is not the first time I have received a message like this. In fact, I probably get about 2-5 messages like this a week.

Usually from other people who also have ADHD/suspect ADHD but don't want medication because they don't think they need it/don't want to need it, and yet can't figure out why they're struggling so much, and ask me how do I do the thing(s) and cope so well and get so much done, etc., etc.

So I'm going to tell you what I told this person tonight in case it helps someone. Yes, I have ADHD. No, I am not medicated due to severe health complications, and yes, I get a lot done. From the outside, I am sure it looks incredibly productive and successful. But I'm going to let you in on what that success feels like.

It feels like dying.

It feels like my brain is on fire; every nerve in my body scraped raw; every part of me wired and exposed to the noise of the world. There is no quiet; there is no calm. And even when my brain does fall silent, it's another kind of death. The inside of my head is sludge, flowing uphill like treacle, weighing me down, pulling me under in the riptide of my inability to focus. I can see what needs to be done, I can see it so clearly, yet sometimes it's like I don't control my own body. Not enough dopamine. Not enough brain chemicals for the message I'm screaming in my head to make my limbs do the simplest of tasks. Like, feed myself. Take a shower. Answer that email. Text my friends back. Go to bed when I'm tired. Write a best-selling novel...

A novel that almost killed me and not because of my other ailments, but because of my unmedicated ADHD.

I didn't realize it at the time, but I was already operating at critical mass when I went into final rewrites/edits. Every coping mechanism I had fell apart. Like training wheels falling off a tricycle, leaving me to wobble unsteadily until the main wheels fell off, swiftly followed by the handlebars until all that was left was me peddling frantically trying to keep my balance and not getting anywhere. I didn't realize it then, but I was heading towards a complete mental collapse. And even when I dragged myself across the finish line with the above and beyond help provided by my friends and editors, I was so burned out I couldn't enjoy my success. Worse, my success made me suicidal.

It took me until very recently, almost two years later, to be able to read Phangs without feeling suicidal. My brain associated it with the trauma of experiencing complete ADHD burnout but having to complete a monumental task anyway.

I had to go into intensive therapy to recover. I am still in intensive therapy for it.

It took me even longer after that to be able to sit down and write without harming myself. I still struggle with it, and I tell you this in all honest sincerity in the hope it makes you realize what it costs me to be "successful" and unmedicated.

And this wasn't the first time I've had to deal with this, either.

I struggled all through high school, all through college, all through every career job I ever had, knowing there was something wrong, but not quite being able to put my finger on it because hey, I still got stuff done, so it couldn't be that bad, right? Surely everyone went through life feeling this way? Right?

...right?

It wasn't until I got my ADHD diagnosis as an adult that I realized what was happening. Why I struggled so much. Why life was so hard. In many ways, it was like the sun coming up. An internal dawning of realization and acceptance, but also rage.

So much rage.

Rage at how much I'd had to struggle because no one noticed because I was quiet and undisruptive. Rage at a system that forced me to learn in ways that were not intuitive to my brain. To always being told, "doesn't apply herself" while it felt like I was clawing my brain apart trying to do what people wanted from me. To a work-life balance, that rewards all the things that make ADHD actively worse. Rage. So much rage it hurts. And to top it all off, I can't be medicated for it. I finally know what's different, I finally know why my world feels raw and turned inside out, and I can't take any of the medications that might help me.

Do you know how angry I wake up every day that there is a possible solution just within my grasp, but my health conditions prevent me from trying them? Do you know how much it hurts? How much I grieve for the person I could be if I was able to have help beyond therapy and coaching? How much happier I could be...

Not productive. Not successful. Happy.

So ask yourself, what do you want more? A child who has to go through all of this and resents you for prolonging their suffering? Who winds up hating themselves by internalizing the false concept that if they just try hard enough, they can do whatever they set their mind to.

Or do you want to help them?

Or if this is you, why are you afraid to help yourself?

Please, don't use me as an example to harm yourself or others. Yes, I am successful without medication. But the toll is high. Too high.

Rid yourself of the idea that you need to suffer more to be allowed help. You don't. They don't. No one does.

[tonitheloftwing]

People could use the excuse of “it’s using cartoon logic” or “Nintendo just wanted to have sexy gays punching each other” but how can I ignore such glaring potholes like Mad Clown having infinite balls and Hippo not having a nose. Where did it go

And don’t even get me started on the medical stuff, Glass Joe’s head scan from his TD cutscene drives me INSANE

Okay so I always thought it was supposed to be an MRI or CT scan, which are the most common scans used to observe damage to brain tissue - but upon further inspection…

That is, without a doubt, an X Ray, which explains my major issue with it before - he had no brain stem, which would be concerning if it was an MRI or CT scan.

But it’s not. The doctor took an X Ray, which only shows bones. You can tell it’s an X Ray because you can see his eye sockets (black), his teeth (white), nasal cavity (yellow), maxilla (blue), mandible (green), and zygomatic bones (purple).

But unfortunately this uncovers more anatomical issues, and a much more concerning one. As you can see on the real world X Ray shown above, the spine will be visible if the neck is scanned. So, where the fuck is his spine.

Also, only bone will show up on an x ray. Other types of brain imaging will show the nasal cartilage, but not x rays, because cartilage is not bone. But not only does Joe’s nose appear on the scan, so does his neck, and his hair, which will never appear on any imaging… this implies that Joe’s hair is made of cartilage, adipose, or muscle, and I do not like this.

But what I don’t like even more is that, why the HELL did the doctor do an x ray and not an MRI??????? I’m not saying they shouldn’t have checked Joe for skull fractures (those eye bags could be an indicator of such!), but I - in my soon-to-be-studying-pre-med opinion - would be much more concerned about damage to the tissue of his brain from repeated blunt force trauma. The best way to observe that would be through an MRI, or hell, even a CT (which is like a less extensive MRI). But they just. Didn’t even fucking bother with one?

That is. Genuine medical malpractice imo. Actually, I think letting Joe continue to box and just sending him off with headgear counts as medical malpractice. This is already lengthy enough and I don’t want to get too depressing, but as someone who is going to study pre med and has taken a few human anatomy classes, writing this made me worry for Joe’s health. He’s probably had multiple traumatic brain injuries already, which is bad for his health for many reasons, but my main concern would be chronic traumatic encephalopathy - a degenerative brain disease, mostly affecting athletes, that results from repeated head trauma. And it can only be diagnosed after death. Joe’s doctor is trying to get him killed!

So, Punch Out is grounded in reality in the fact that the doctors suck, too

Punch Out worldbuilding is so funny. At first it’s like yeah okay haha they made the referee Mario that’s kinda funny, but the series still seems to be grounded in reality. And then you realize that Donkey Kong canonically exists as a being with human level intelligence that’s allowed to box. And also squirrels and bears have achieved a level of sentience where they can consent to participating in boxing matches, too. And then there’s a magical catboy, what is he doing here? And Mike Tyson exists, too. Why is the boxing league called World Video Boxing Association? Do they know they’re in a video game? And if Sailor Moon exists in the Punch Out universe as fiction, but Mario, DK, and Mike Tyson are real people, what separates the line between fiction and reality here? Are there other real world people who exist in the Punch Out universe? Or people from other fictional universes? The series takes place in New York City; if Little Mac ran into Jerry Seinfeld, would he be actual celebrity Jerry Seinfeld, or Seinfeld Jerry Seinfeld, or Barry B. Benson? If all real celebrities are canon to the Punch Out universe, does this mean that Jim Creeggan could fight in the WVBA? Does Kittydog exist in the Punch Out universe????

[valyrou]

Star Wars characters love language

Authors note: Hi!! I‘m new to Tumblr so idk if what I’m doing is correct? I assume this is a blog everyone can see an Re-Blog? (Wich I’m ok with) I’m terribly sorry if anyone did this already but I just had this idea while writing something else lol

Features: Anakin Skywalker, Obi wan Kenobi and Din Djarin

Tw: Bad gramma, Y/n has they/them pronouns and it’s not described how they look like (Idk if I should have written this somewhere else but it might trigger some people so..) Mention of sickness and injuries

ALSO MASSIVE TRIGGER WARNING BC I GOT REALLY TIRED AND LAZY AT THE END SO I‘M SO SO SORRY FOR THIS

(Requests are currently open <3)

Anakin Skywalker

Physical touch

This man is all about touching. If it’s after a risky mission or an argument with his master, he just wants to be held tight and forget about the constant stress and responsibility that he has laying on his shoulders.

Anakin came rushing to his chambers after he got patched up in the med bay. He was sent on a mission to collect information from some spy guy that was lurking on some ship, turns out it was all plotted to kill whoever came to collect said information. His steps slowed down and came to a full stop when he stood Infront of his door, wich would led him into his home. His heart started beating faster when he felt the familiar presents in his chambers, waiting for him to come in.

The door slid open and revealed his loved one waiting impatiently just mere meters away from him. Anakins tensed shoulders relaxed as he rushed to their side to embrace them. He gently pulled them against his aching body while pressing soft kisses on top of their head „Welcome home Ani“ your delicate voice bought butterflies to his stomach „I‘ve missed you my love“ his voice not more than a whisper to your ear. Anakin let go of his S/O and cupped their face with his hands while staring into their eyes like he hasn’t seen them in years. He caressed their face and gently gently pressed his lips to theirs. Finally he could hold them Ingos Arms again.

Obi wan

Quality time

We all know Obi wan. He is caring and kind, but also keen to the Jedi order. In order to not stand out on your relation ship, spending time together is the perfect thing especially if your a Jedi too! He would enjoy your company and eventually sneak a kiss here and there (ahh omggg)

It was a late sunny day that y/n and Kenobi decided to take a walk together in a more relaxed part of the city. Occasionally people would walk by and greet the two Jedi politely while the two of them would greet back. Obi wan took his beloved behind a building that formed into a platform that showed a beautiful view of the passing suns. Obi took the hands of his partner in his much bigger ones „I wish I could show you how much I love you Obi“ Kenobis face softened and gently squeezed their hands „Your time is enough to show me how much you care for me love“ he pressed a kiss on their forehead as the sun slowly disappeared behind the horizon.

Din Djarin

Act of service

Throughout the whole series there where acts of services so you can’t tell me that he wouldn’t shower his S/O in exactly that??? He is such a sweet man (Ugh I’m obsessed with Pedro pascal but that’s another story..) he would appreciate acts of service but would most likely do them himself for you

The Mandalorian Heard a Loud sneeze coming from not so far away in his ship. It didn’t startle him, it worried him. It was the sixth time he had heard it, so the next time another sneeze was heard,he chose the first planet he was the closest to and landed there. When the ship stood still on the chosen planet he stood up and walked to his obvious sick partner „Din.? Why did we land?“ the raspy voice of his loved one worried him even more then the sneezing. His gloved hand reached to their forehead before sighing„You‘re burning up! As long as this is, we will not continue our journey“ his voice sounded serious tho his face expressed pure worry, but that view was cut off since he wore his signature mandolorian helmet „But Mando we have to get the kid to its kind!“ the sickling protested. A heavy sigh was heard and the mandolorian shook his head, while he gently pushed his partner into bed „Just let me do this for you..“ he pleaded. No one could resist that genuine plead coming from this man so y/n had no other choice than to give up and relax in the small bed.

Even the green baby came to the side of the bed and patted the sick ones hand „You stay here too, while I look for medicine“ he said demanding to the kid that made brabble noises that seemed like a form of him understanding. The bounty hunter left the ship and looked for a small village that would help him with his problem. Meanwhile y/n had slipped into a deep sleep and only woke up when they felt a wet cloth on their head „Mornin sunshine..“ the masked man greeted „You didn’t need to do all this for me“ they said with a soft smile on their face. Din caressed their face and shook his head „You are worth the trouble Cyar’ika“ he said softly

Ily all thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed lol

Re-blogs are allowed <3

[rickgrimesdoingrickthings]

"No one will lock you up-" Rick extended a hand slowly to keep Armand calm. "W...wait...first I'll check what we can do- okay?" The kid sure had anxiety- Rick wasn't surprised, considering the story. The man grunted, rubbing his eyes, letting out a sigh, sipping some of the milkshake. "I meant stuff like meds to prevent the craving, or things that will replace the drugs, maybe some therapy so you can control yourself better."

He scratched the back of his head. "I'll do what's in my power so you get what you need, okay?" Rick seemed quite serious, quite worried- "I can't promise anything, but I'll do my best. I'll contact all the services I can, I'll check everything we have available for kids in your situation, and if we can't find a way, any way at all, I can try convince my wife to....so we can help- but...but you need to promise you won't run away again- promise me you won't...try anything crazy, okay? You need to stop being exposed to abuse, urgent." Rick facepalmed, pondering. Fuck, what was he doing? There were so many problems in his marriage already- if he took Armand in...things could be over for good. Even so...he couldn't just...wash his hands, ignore the kid and pretend everything was okay- Could Rick sleep at night knowing Armand was probably being beaten or worse? It was not any kid, it was a kid Rick had the chance to help. "I would be....just a few months....just some months and nothing more..." The officer kept muttering to himself, softly, as if trying to convince himself, trying to think. "Another foster home won't work...the kid is terrified..." He groaned a bit, freezing his brain as he sipped too much milkshake at once. Pulling a kid he didn't know into his house...that sure was something big...but...it was the kid's life. He was on the streets...doing shit... He probably would end up caught or killed. Oh Armand....just how did you end up in America.... Rick kept asking himself. What a fucking bomb. "Let's just...focus on eating now...okay? No need to panic. I won't force you into anything. Just be aware." Rick looked right into Armand's eyes, very very serious. "Be aware. For real. Right now, you're under my custody. Meaning I have a saying i things. If you try to run, if you try anything crazy and another cop gets you, then there won't be much I can do, got it? I really want to help, and you'll have to help me too, or else, there won't be much I can do. Also...don't threaten any cop with a knife, it's an excuse for many to just...shoot, alright? And no...you won't be faster...and even if you were faster, very high chances you still would get shot." He muttered. Yes, Rick had noticed the knife, but he chose to stay quiet about it, until now at least. "It's very late. After we eat, I'll have to drive back to the station to fill the reports. I won't jail you, don't worry, and I won't return you to your foster family either. I'll issue the notification about what you're going through, and we'll see what we can do."

@armandlucienduval

Closed Rp with: @rickgrimesdoingrickthings and @armandlucienduval

[creativeashproductions]

Change of Scenery // Evan Buckley

IN WHICH: Captain Bobby Nash has kept a secret from his friends, his wife and his step children since 2015 when he came to LA. Bobby’s eldest and only surviving child comes to LA to reconcile and make amends all the while she catches the eye of a certain blue eyed firefighter.

Warnings: Swearing, death/familial loss, pregnancy, blood, angst, injuries/medical emergency, and fluff

Words: 8k

A/N: Back at it with another 9-1-1 fic. Hope you enjoy, and I may just have to do another crossover with 9-1-1 and Julie and the Phantoms.

TO BE TAGGED SEND AN INBOX/ASK PLEASE!

Masterlist

There are moments in our lives that define us, whether it can be known as a positive or negative, but the outcome is always the same. A six-letter word that strikes fear and excitement into the souls of humans is change. The fear can be for ourselves or as a result of a child, a sibling, or a parent branching out on their own. Unfortunately, you had gone through a harsh and cruel experience on a cold winter night in the city you grew up in.

A typical Thursday filled with classes at the college you attended in Minnesota on a scholarship, nothing out of the ordinary. The plan had been to drive to your parents’ apartment to catch up with them for the weekend. Saturday morning was already reserved for a girls day with your little sister Brook and your mom. In the afternoon, you’d promised to take your brother Bobby to the ball diamond.

Your bag was packed, the plan to drive straight from class to St. Paul the following day to arrive in the daylight. Your dad struggled with worry when it came to you driving in the dark and especially in winter with icy roads.

“Y/N!” Dottie screeched from the living room of the four-bedroom dormitory. The pretty and curvy brunette had been the first friend you made in college.

Typically Dottie was on the quieter side, so when she screamed, you practically sprinted to the girl.

“Where’s the fire?” You demanded with a smirk at the reference to a topic that was a constant in your family. 

The fire drills your father conducted every four months for an exit plan in case of a fire and general information to save yourselves. He had also trained you to remember fire hazards and how to call dispatch with clear information if that time ever came. It never did and hopefully never would.

“The Lakeview Apartments in St. Paul.” Dottie’s dark brown eyes spoke only of pity and concern. The five foot ten roommate literally caught you as you tumbled into her arms with a loud grief-stricken scream.

You were forever indebted to the brunette for the plans she sacrificed to drive you back to St. Paul. There was absolutely no chance Dottie would allow you to both drive and be alone with no news. The media hadn’t released the names of the 148 deaths the fire relentlessly tore from the land of the living.

“I want to prepare you for what you’ll see. Your mother suffered severe third-degree burns over the majority of her body.” The kind nurse, also one of your friend’s parent, explained as she guided you to the Burn Center in the Regions Hospital, “I don’t want to lie and tell you she’ll be fine. You’re an adult Y/N. You deserve the truth and not be coddled.”

“Is she gonna survive?” You quietly asked, “Has she woken up since she was brought in?”

“The doctor placed her on a high dosage of morphine for the pain. Your father hasn’t left her side.” Lucinda informed you with sympathy written as over her face, The hazel eyes unable to adequately meet yours.

“I’ll check on her, then could you take me to the rooms my siblings are in?” You asked, completely unaware Brook and Bobby had been DOA at the hospital.

Your father hadn’t answered the text messages or the voicemails you had left on his phone—radio silent. You couldn’t be mad when he was with your mom, but a text would have been nice.

“This is where your mother is staying for the unforeseeable future. If you need anything, you can call me.” Lucinda softly replied before turning her heel to head back to the Burn Centre’s front desk.

It was horrific walking into a room with no idea if the occupant who had raised you would survive. The confident, gorgeous mother you had for the past nineteen years was unfamiliar to you, the extensive gauze covering nearly every inch of her body. You almost couldn’t even recognize the man sitting in the chair with his hands wrapped. 

“Dad? What happened?” You questioned the grieving man. The only person left in your family as you would soon come to know.

“Y/N?” Bobby gasped, pushing himself to his feet, staring at his only living child. The guilt ate at him just staring at you with those light brown eyes, “Oh, sweetheart.”

Your dad crossed the room in a few steps. The scent of smoke was still clinging to every part of him, but it was fine. Your dad was okay, minus the wounds on his hands. You’d always been closer with your father than your mother.

“Dad, what happened?” You quietly asked the ashamed firefighter that had to reconcile his feelings on the fire and his career—that struggle ending up pushing you away when he really just wanted you as close as possible.

“The building caught on fire after an ember from a heater lit a blanket on fire,” Bobby informed you with his eyes pinned on his wife. Bobby knew the chances of Marcy surviving were incredibly low, and he had to tell you that.

Bobby only knew the details passed on from a firefighter who pitied the man who’d lost most of his family. 

“Is Mom gonna be okay?” You questioned, and the said injured woman in the bed weakly responded.

“Baby?” Marcy quietly questioned from her absolutely still position on the hospital bed, “Uh, Bobby.”

You left your father’s side to be as close to your mom as possible, with the clear plastic separating you for her safety. Your heart shattered at the sheer exhaustion in her pretty blue eyes. 

“Hi, Mom.” You shakily spoke with one hand lightly pressed against the plastic divider. You didn’t even notice when your dad stepped up too.

“Marcy?” Bobby called out from right beside you, just as torn up, but Bobby carried extra weight on his shoulders, “We’re right here, Marcy. It’s okay. It’s okay.”

The muffled grunt of pain, your mom’s attempt to save you from grief, Marcy let out as she turned her head to look at you. You knew deep in your gut that this was the time place you would see your mom alive. And by the look in her eyes, she knew too.

“The...kids…?” Your mom’s breathing became more erratic as she questioned the man she viewed as her hero. The man she believed had saved her and their youngest children, “Where...are they?”

“The kids are fine.” The way your father said it and the tears led to the knowledge once kept from you.

“No.” You whispered, seeing the total grief written clear on his face. The pain meds and agony kept your mom from knowing the truth.

“They’re safe.”

“I knew you’d come and save us.” Your mom breathed as her eyes started hiding the pretty blue you’d now only see in pictures. In your dreams, until even those faded as father time cruelly pulled you along.

Then your worst nightmare happened. You watched as the woman you looked up to flatlined with the thought of her children safe. You’d always know she’d held on just long enough to find out the state of her children. You could only hope she’d forgive your father for lying to her as she died.

“Mom!” You screamed, fighting the arms of an orderly restraining you. You barely noticed the resistance to your frantic attempts.

One minute you were staring at a team unsuccessfully trying to revive your long-gone mother, then you were in a hotel room. The atmosphere tense and quiet between father and daughter, with the ghost of your dead family to keep you both company. You could hear Brook gagging every time you’d kissed your now ex. You could see Bobby toddling after you years ago.

At least you had your father—a father whose guilt festered until he couldn’t hold it in anymore.

“It was my fault.” He murmured, staring at the barely eaten burger that tasted solely just cardboard. He couldn’t bear to look at your face, “I didn’t mean to leave it on.”

Your head snapped to stare at him in disbelief, “What do you mean you didn’t mean to leave it on?”

“I-I went to the roof to sleep after your mom kicked me out. I didn’t have my keys to the apartment I had below ours.” Bobby began spilling the lies he’d told to you about his addictions. Of the apartment, you’d had no clue was even in his possessions.

The pain of losing your family tore into you, “You took my mom away from me. I’ll never get to share my wedding day with her. Shopping for a dress and gossiping about boys. I’ll never be able to wipe Brook’s tears during her first heartbreak.”

Each word broke Bobby more and more.

“You stole my future. You’re selfish, ungrateful and utterly pathetic. You cost so many people so much, all because you sought out your next high.” You spat, glaring at someone you’d never expected to hurt you. You didn’t notice your hands grabbing your possessions nor opening the hotel room door, “You couldn’t even properly try to get clean.”

“Y/N-”

“Get your shit together before you kill anyone else. I never want to see you again.” You sobbed with regret already festering in your body, but pride held you back from apologizing.

Upon your return to your dorm with Dottie by your side, you immediately began the process to enter an exchange program. Within a month, your feet entered Sydney Airport. You didn’t return to America for several years.

You took a job as a casual lifeguard on Bondi Beach, met Lucas in a meet-cute situation at the grocery store. You graduated college and found a job as a paramedic as you began becoming a flight paramedic. In 2020 Lucas and you discovered you’d be bringing in a little baby into the world.

Learning about your little Cashew growing safe in your womb fanned the flame of desire to reconcile. Ultimately the pride kept pushing the urge to apologize for the cruel words you told your father further away. You naively believed you had all the time in the world.  

Remember the six-letter scary word? If losing your mom, siblings, and father was a devastating blow, losing Lucas was nearly tied. Your little Cashew lost their father before they even got to meet him. That was push enough to pack up your home and fly back to America with your father’s new address as soon as you could.

In the fallout of the apartment fire, your father relocated from Minnesota to Los Angeles. 

Los Angeles, 2020

As soon as you’d found the nicest but cheapest hotel to stay in until you found a place, you walked the streets of LA. The first order of business of approaching your father at his workplace as you had no personal address. Residing still in Minnesota, Deputy Chief Evans had only given you the address of Bobby’s work.

You could only hope Bobby wouldn’t turn you away. That he was willing to bridge the gap, you’d widened over the years. That he could forgive the silence to each email, he sent when you changed numbers.

“We should go out to dinner.” The female voice was what brought you back to the present time. The woman was beautiful with her buzzed head and clear skin.

Right by her side was a dark-haired male of Asian ethnicity with a bag thrown over his shoulder, “If you’re paying, you bet I’ll be there.”

The two continued to converse in their own world until the man had to literally dodge you when they finally noticed you.

“Does Chief Bobby Nash work here?” You inquired, having no desire to enter small talk when the baby was sitting on your bladder again. You nearly retched when the man stared down at your swollen midsection, shocked, “It’s not his baby.”

Hen caught the evident disgust on your face, “He’s in his office. I’ll guide you there…”

“Y/N.” You supplied the firefighter. Hen smiled in response, “And your name is…”

“Henrietta Wilson, but you can call me Hen. That was Howard Han. He goes by Chimney, and I’ve been sworn to secrecy on the name.” Hen chuckled in her steps to the closed door of the fire chief. Hen swiftly knocked on the door to give Bobby a heads up.

“Come in!” Bobby called from his pile of paperwork he had pushed and waited to work on. It had slipped as the date came closer. Your twenty-seventh birthday, the seventh one since he last saw you.

“Cap, a woman is asking for you,” Hen told her friend and boss. It’s a good thing you didn’t choose to surprise your father because Hen was shorted, and your bump made manoeuvring around tricky.

“What can I do…” Bobby trailed off when he saw the girl waiting to talk to him. The pen in his hand dropped to the table in shock.

Hen glanced between the two equally taken aback individuals, “Am I missing something here?”

“Hey, dad.” You whispered to the man who’d been dreaming of this moment since the minute you left. He’d searched for you at your previous college and nearly made a missing person report.

“Dad?” Hen couldn’t pick her jaw up from the floor if she even wanted to because this was juicy information. Sure, Bobby had caved into telling his team, his family that he’d lost his wife and two children in a fire.

He rarely talked about his life before the 118, but he’d never mentioned having a surviving daughter. Not in the handful of times he’d talked about the tragedy, nor did he have any objects or photos of you. 

“You’re really here?” Bobby lightly chuckled with a twinkle in his eye. Hen had only seen a handful of times. All of them had Athena in the scene, “I missed you.”

“I missed you too.” You beamed, stepping closer to the man you’d missed dearly, “I’m so sorry for the way I left. What I said was cruel and untrue. You aren’t selfish, and I can’t blame you for something you couldn’t control.”

Bobby grinned. He’d stepped around his desk only to halt when he took in an undeniable development—the baby bump you carried.

“Is-”

“I’m pregnant. Six months along with a baby girl.” You laughed to the apparent disbelief in your father’s light brown eyes. His gaze continued to shift between the bump and your e/c eyes.

“Wow. Sorry, this is...wow.” 

“She’s one of the reasons I wanted to come back. To fix our relationship because I want her to know her grandpa. You’re the only grandparent Poppy will know.” Bobby was quick to tug you into his arms as soon as the first tear dropped down your cheek.

There was so much you wanted to tell your father, but that overwhelming grief rose higher. You’d left Australia where Lucas laid in a plot in a cemetery. You left the friends you’d found in the city. Left the lifeguard job you’d come to love.

“Where are you and your partner staying?”

“He...uh...Lucas passed away recently.”

The arms holding you tightened in response to your confession, “Oh sweetheart.”

“I didn’t know where else to go. I can’t stay in the home we bought. Not the place he died when I couldn’t save him.”

“I don’t know what happened, but it wasn’-”

“Don’t coddle me. I was...am a paramedic. A flight paramedic, to be specific, so I know that my hesitation could be the reason he died.”

Your career took the father by complete and utter surprise because you’d always planned on a different job. Before the fire that claimed so many lives, you’d never entertained a career in the emergency field.

“We have a lot to catch up on. First, you need to know that I’ll always love your mother no matter what, but you need to know. I met someone when I first moved here, and we were friends at first. She divorced her husband. We started dating...sweetheart, I remarried.”

A wave of emotions flared in your chest, from betrayal to sadness and ultimately happiness. Having lost your first love, you understood and knew if love came around for you, you wouldn’t ignore it. Lucas wouldn’t want that.

“I can’t wait to meet her.”

Re-entering into Bobby’s new life was a difficult adjustment for everyone included. Tension had risen between Athena and Bobby for a brief period. Athena hadn’t even been aware of your existence, but she could fault Bobby. Athena had even told her first husband about her late fiance Emmett when they were still together.

It was difficult for you with the new addition of two step-siblings in the same birth order as Brook and Bobby had been. The Grant siblings had welcomed you into the family without any reservations.

“Did you ever get to fly the chopper?” Harry asked as he scrubbed the dirty dish from the Sunday family dinner. 

It was the first dinner that had no awkward tension since you arrived back in the country. Athena had taken a bit to warm up, but it was nothing personal. She’d actually been the one to find you you’d been staying at a hotel. Mama Athena did not like her pregnant step-daughter living at a hotel. She’d actually stormed your room with Hen and Karen as back up to pack your room and leave for the Grant-Nash house.

“No. I had to help keep the patients alive. If I’m telling the truth...sometimes I didn’t even notice I was in the air.” You whispered to your stepbrother. He was just invested in your career as he had been when Bobby first entered their lives.

“That is so cool!” Harry enthused with soap suds splashing your thin knitted sweater. Harry’s mouth formed an ‘o’ when you flicked water onto his face in retaliation.

“Do you know Bondi Beach in Australia?” You inquired the youth with the chore of dishes completed.

“Yeah! There’s a tv show called Bondi Rescue! I watch the clips on YouTube!” Harry exclaimed, hot on your heels to the couch. Out of May and Harry, he followed you around with questions about your life in Australia.

“I was a casual lifeguard. I’m not featured on that show, but I would get called in when a lifeguard was needed. It paired well with my job as a flight paramedic.” You half-smiled, remembering the Bondi lifeguards who had welcomed you into the family. You became one of them when they started pranking you.

“Did you ever see a shark-”

“Harry, go brush your teeth. Leave Y/N alone.” Athena informed her youngest from the open patio doors. Your father, Athena and May had been outside as soon as the table had been cleared.

“But-”

“Harry,” Athena warned the youngest Grant. Harry didn’t attempt to argue with his stern mother; all he did was hug you quickly. You watched the young boy disappear into the hallway.

“He reminds you of your little brother?” Athena questioned. In your time of reminiscing, the older woman had settled in Harry’s previous position.

“A little.” You whispered, “Thank you for welcoming me into the family. For making my dad happy.”

“You know I may have some baby clothes put away if you’d like to use them?” Athena offered with that smile that made you feel at home. Athena was far different from your late mother, with her presence commanding respect and intelligence. Your mom was similar, but I suppose it could be described as a softer touch.

“Anyway, saving a penny is appreciated. I have a question for you also.” You hesitantly started with a bundle of nerves deep in your belly. Athena turned to give you her full attention.

“Well? Out with it.” Athena pushed, but she had a slight feeling of what you were about to ask her.

“My mom was one the strongest women I know. It hurts that my baby won’t get to experience her love and guidance, and you can say no. We’ve only known each other a short time, but would you consider...maybe being a grandma to my baby?”

Giddy was the feeling Athena developed along with the laughing smile that only came from happiness. The woman could only nod her head in response to your hesitant question. To Athena’s knowledge but not yours, Bobby was softly smiling, watching his formerly estranged daughter getting along with your stepmom.

“Oh!” You gasped as your baby kicked hard enough for her foot imprint to be seen through your knitted sweater. 

Bobby was by your side in concern the second he heard your startled sound, but Athena wasn’t that concerned. Athena remembered having the same reaction.

“Are you okay?” Bobby frantically questioned. He faltered when the woman shared a belly-deep laugh at the sheer fear written in the seasoned firefighter’s eyes.

“Poppy was kicking.” You chuckled as your father’s shoulders dropped in relief, “Here.”

Your nimble fingers clasped around your father’s wrist to bring his palm to the spot Poppy was kicking. A certain lightness flooded your entire body, being capable of sharing this experience with Bobby. Watching tears well up in the grandpa to be’s brown eyes.

“Whoa.” Bobby breathlessly spoke as Poppy kicked against his palm. The feeling building in his was exhilarating with the small amount of grief mixed in, “I remember when your mom was pregnant with you. We didn’t know if we were having a girl or boy, but she was adamant you would be a kickboxer. So active.”

Athena watched as the relationship between father and daughter started healing directly in front of her eyes. The Sergeant was about to give you two some privacy when you caught her hand in your free one.

“Here.” You informed the older woman shifting to place her hand where your father’s hand had previously been. Your e/c eyes sought the wonder-filled different shades of brown eyes the couple had.

“You should get some sleep,” Athena spoke, staring at her hand resting on your bump. Her dark chocolate brown rising to find your gaze, “You won’t be getting a lot once she arrives.”

Bobby and Athena watched as you turned the corner to the spare room Athena’s parents used when they visited. For the time being, you’ve moved into the room, and the Grant-Nash house hoped you would stay. May had always wanted a sister, and Harry loved all the stories you told about Australia.

“You know, at some point, you’ll have to talk to her.”

“I just was-’

“-without anyone else being the buffer. Bobby, both your lives is evidence enough that some things are too trivial to stress over.” Athena pinned her stern gaze on her husband. The same husband is actively trying to avoid her penetrating gaze.

“What I did-’

“Is in the past, Bobby. You have a second chance with that wonderful woman in that bedroom and our grandchild. Now, are you sure that having the party at the firehouse is okay?”

A hand supported the base of your back where an ache tended to stay for most of the day. That ache wasn’t the worst symptom of your pregnancy. You had heartburn constantly that tied with unfortunate constipation that had thankfully lessened. Your purse always had a cardigan for the hot flashes as well.

“Perfect! May has my car, and Bobby needed that.” Athena beamed from the open bay of the 118. One of the firefighters, Eddie, if you recalled, snagged your purse and the specific ingredient for a recipe.

“You could have borrowed Bobby’s-”

“His vehicle is in the shop Buck.” Athena interrupted the only member of the 118 you had let to officially meet.

Now there were two suspects of the sudden shortness of breath you started experiencing. It could be Poppy in the limited space in your body or the handsome firefighter. Buck had to be hands down none of the most attractive men you’d ever encountered. His dark blonde hair had minimal height, but the soft waves made your fingers itch to feel it. His ocean blue eyes crinkled at the corners with mirth.

“Ah, so you’re flesh and blood of Cap?” Buck questioned from in front of you. His blue eyes centred solely on you, with half a mind thanking himself that he could navigate the station blindfolded in the dark.

“For the last twenty-seven years, I have been.” You retorted, stopping at the edge of the stairs to the apparatus. Your keen sense of smell catching one of your favourite meals your father had dug up from the recipes he hadn’t used in years.

A zing of electricity trailed off your arm when a calloused palm met yours. Your e/c eyes followed the path of tan skin until it reached the shirt sleeve of Buck’s t-shirt. The shirt emblazoned on the chest with the department’s insignia. The man in the casual uniform guided you safely up the stairs with his hand on your back.

The pressure of Buck’s hand on your aching back muscle nearly brought what would be an embarrassing moan from your lips. Thankfully a gasp of surprise fell out instead at the banner hanging with other decorations.

“What?” You choked, cupping your hands to your face. Pure unadulterated shock and affection flooded every inch of you.

The entire 118 squad intermixed with their loved ones surrounded the open area with grins. On a table behind everyone was many wrapped gifts. But the cake was the most impressive.

A large rectangular cake in the realistic shape of a fire engine parked in front of a fire hydrant with a fondant hose going to the truck. On top of the fire truck was the turnout boots next to the matching helmet, the 118 proudly on it. You adored the turnout coat draping off the top to hang off the side.

“If you look at the helmet, it says Poppy.” Buck enthused, guiding you even closer to catch the immaculate cake, “It has to be the best cake we’ve gotten from them.”

“Hey, my rebar head cake was phenomenal!” Chimney called with a belying grin on his face. His hand encased by a brunette woman about his height with her heels on.

“It’s a long story.” Buck offered as soon as you gave him a weird questioning look, “Let me introduce you to everyone!”

For the next five minutes, you spend it by meeting the family of 118, including Eddie’s completely adorable son. Christopher was happy to sit next to you as soon as Harry had found you. Slowly the others came closer to hear the stories.

“What’re the most common injuries on the beach?” Denny, Hen and Karen’s ten-year-old son questioned.

“Bluebottle Jellyfish stings. On one day, we had hundreds of people come to the tower for stings, and the treatment for the minor ones is stingose spray and ice.”

“My question is how a girl from Minnesota is a lifeguard in Australia. Especially on Sydney’s most dangerous beach.” Chimney inserted, waving his bottle of pop at you, his eyes kept moving towards the wine Maddie brought.

Unfortunately, the 118 wouldn’t be celebrating with the wine until their shifts ended in a few short hours. It was a damn miracle they hadn’t been called out yet.

“This former Minnesotan spent summers at my best friend’s parents’ place in Cali as a lifeguard. Also, Bondi is not the most dangerous beach in Sydney. That’s Tamarama.” You pointed towards the man who raised his hands in surrender.

“Have you ever seen a dead body?” Harry asked, bringing a sobering silence in the question’s wake.

Your body language changed as soon as he asked, “Unfortunately, I’ve seen death as a paramedic and as a lifeguard.”

“You’re a paramedic? I thought you were just a lifeguard?” Buck asked, interested in the new information. Buck could feel his Captain’s eyes on the back of his head; he was sure Bobby could smell the attraction on Buck.

“Casual lifeguard. Called when needed as a backup.” You turned your e/c eyes towards the arguably youngest member of the 118.

“How many dead-”

“Harry.” Athena warned her son from continuing a topic that killed the ease and happiness you’d shown previously, “Why don’t we stop talking about-”

“Too many, Harry.” You interrupted your stepmom with a gentle smile towards the woman, “It’s not just drowning that claims lives but also the cliffs surrounding the beaches. Lifeguards patrol more than the beaches and water. Lifeguards respond to medical emergencies, mostly spinal until the paramedics arrive.”

“Oh-”

“I had a fellow lifeguard leave the job because of the suicides we deal with.”

“...who wants cake?” Karen used the quiet interlude of the much too serious topic for a group of kids barely in the double digits of ages. All referenced children followed Hen’s life to the beautiful baked creation.

“Sorry for getting dark there.”

“We all know the dark side of the jobs we chose to do. You sound like you miss Australia. Are you going to return there?” Eddie questioned with one eye pinned on his son, consuming more sugar than he wished.

Eddie’s question did raise self-doubt, but you knew that ultimately living in Australia was no longer a viable option. 

“There’s nothing there for me.”

Eddie, Buck and your father understood that mentality to a ‘t’ with family complications keeping them away. Your father for obvious reasons, whereas Eddie and Buck each had a living family with opinions only they saw right.

“You’re always welcome here. Especially when you bring that little cutie to the firehouse.” Maddie cooed towards your baby bump. The 911 dispatcher had asked many questions about your pregnancy.

 Maddie was the type of person who could make a stranger feel like they had known for their entire lives.

“Here.”

A plate of the cake was thrust in front of your face courtesy of Maddie’s brother Buck. It is quite literally the perfect size you could ask for. In his other hand, he had a new bottle of water waiting for you to grab.

“Thank you, Buck.” Your shock must have shown in your voice when his cheeks flushed.

“This whole party is a celebration for you, so you shouldn’t have to get up...unless you want to!” Buck rushed to respond, getting more flustered with the amused look of his older sister on him, “You’re already doing something absolutely amazing, so you should get to rela-”

“Buck!” You laughed, ending the older man’s rambling thoughts. The entire party attendees had started watching Buck’s failed smooth attempt.

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

Buck mutely nodded in response, “No prob-”

The bell was the one to interrupt him instead. The on-duty firefighters rushed down from the upper levels to the lockers. The swift suiting up impressed you as it was like you blinked, and the bay was empty.

“Should be the last call before they get off shift.” Maddie, still occupied with the cake she was eating, “That wine looks so good!”

Your attention snapped from the vacant spots the 118 vehicles parked to the woman ploughing down on the cake. Sure it was good, but not that good. Maybe you could tell as a pregnant woman, or perhaps you just caught some of the symptoms you felt.

“How far along are you?”

Maddie froze, “What are you talk-”

“You’re pregnant, right?”

“Don’t tell anyone. Chim and I found out recently, but we want to wait on telling people. Once the first trimester is over, everyone can know.” Maddie pleaded with two hands cupped under her chin in a prayer position. The pretty brunette using the puppy dog eyes on the new friend she’d made.

“You should tell Buck-”

“We will once we enter the safe zone. So tell me about your baby’s father.” Maddie swiftly changed the subject, unaware of the ache developing in your midsection.

“Lucas Gowan.” You mussed, recalling the freckled half Australian half Scots man with the thick red locks.

“Ooh, is he still in Australia?”

“Technically, he is. I met him at the grocery store near the university campus. I’d transferred to escape my grief. It was purely an attraction at first sight before developing into love at first sight. We convocated and moved into a cosy little place. We’d only just found out about the baby when Lucas passed away.”

As you told Maddie, your hand had moved to cradle the only remaining piece of Lucas. 

“His death was unexpected and sudden. He’d taken a run the morning of our scan to find out baby Gowan’s gender. He fell off the side of the cliff. I was told he died instantly. The investigator believes his shoelace untied, and he stepped on it. Fell right off the side.”

“I’m so sorry.” Maddie breathed, leaning closer to hold your hands in her own, “He’d be so proud of you. For returning to the states. Do you keep in contact with his family?”

“He was an only child. Parents died in a car accident when he was ten years old. He was in foster care until he aged out of the system. Poppy is named after his mom.”

Maddie instinctively knew talking about Lucas was, “You know you get along pretty well with Buck... I’ve never seen him so flustered.”

“Maddie, I can tell you are a very intelligent woman, but you’re wrong here. Why would a guy like Buck be interested in a pregnant woman with a reconciling relationship with her father and his Captain while grieving her baby’s dad?”

Maddie tilted her head to the side, “Because I know my brother. He’s only ever had that look when I first moved to LA. Back when Abby was still important to him.”

“We’ll just have to agree to disagree.”

Maddie’s mouth opened to speak, but you were saved by the bell when Athena called you over for pictures. Then her attempts got thwarted once more when the 118 returned to the house perfectly synced to the end of shift.

“Driving here was the last time until the baby’s here. You’ve got precious cargo-”

“I’m seven months pregnant; I can still drive. There’s no law saying I can’t-”

Never argue with Athena Grant-Nash, “It may not be illegal, but I won’t endanger my daughter or my granddaughter.”

“I have to get to my OB/GYN appointment tomorrow. You and Dad each have a long shift during my scheduled appointment. Harry is both too young to drive and in school. May has a shift at dispatch. There’s literally no one available to take me.”

Bobby watched as two of the most important women in his life argued over something as trivial as driving. Harry shook at listening to someone fighting against his mother; she could be terrifying.

“I can take her.”

Everyone in the fir house turned to the voice who’d offered suddenly and found the sheepish form of a tall firefighter. Eddie’s eyebrows raised at his best friend.

“I don’t work tomorrow. I’ve got no plans. Albert’s got some date with a girl at her place.”

“I couldn’t put you out.”

“You need a ride, and I’ll be bored, so why not take my new friend to her baby doctor.”

“Baby doctor?” Hen parroted to her wife in astonishment towards her coworker and close friend. Both the women found the blatant flirting from Buck to the soon to be mother.

“She’ll take you up on the offer. She’s staying in our guest room. Come early for breakfast before you go. We’ll be having waffles.”

Buck found any excuse to visit the Grant-Nash home with the motive to hang out with you ever since the baby shower. From delivering baked goods from your favourite bakery to insisting on driving you to appointments. Didn’t matter if Athena or Bobby could take you; Buck was adamant he drove you.

The friendship was easy going and very natural, like a ball glove still moulded perfectly to your hand. The hangouts in your home evolved to weekly visits to restaurants with guidelines to the current event happening worldwide. 

Ultimately it even led to a test date.

“You look breathtaking.” Buck breathlessly informed you once he’d gently pushed your chair closer to the table.

“Thank you.” You kindly responded despite thinking the complete opposite to the charming man sitting across from you.

Athena and May had helped you get ready for the date with calming words on how going on a date so far into the pregnancy was okay. Then, your father had tentatively inserted himself with sage advice on re-entering the dating scene.

“I thought we could grab some ice cream after,” Buck spoke up as soon as the waiter had taken your drink order. Buck had decided to refrain from alcohol and went with glasses of lemonade and water.

“You shouldn’t say that. I’ll just want ice cream.” You snickered, caressing the taut belly you’d grown to love. In fact, the firm push of a heel announced Poppy’s agreement with ice cream as dessert.

“How is Poppy?”

“The doc says she’s right on track. Healthy all around and in the position, she’s supposed to be at this stage.” Buck adored the affectionate smile that always appeared when the topic of your pregnancy was brought up.

“That’s amazing! Bobby gushes about you and Poppy. The fridge has an entire door dedicated to sonograms of Poppy. Even a few from that maternity shoot Hen and Maddie surprised you with.”

A few weeks had passed since the baby shower the 118 had surprised you with. Maddie had announced her pregnancy to the joy of the chosen family she had. Bobby had put together a crib he had painted. Michael, Athena’s ex-husband, had started making plans for adding on to the house for a room for the baby.

Despite informing the architect, you planned on moving out when you had saved enough, he’d made a sound argument. Athena would want a place for the baby to stay when you visited, or the woman demanded to babysit.

Now you found yourself in a National forest not far from Los Angeles, posing in front of nature. A surprise photoshoot Hen and Karen had organized with Karen’s brother Trey. Maddie and Athena had been the ones who drove you.

“Hold the teddy bear on your bump,” Trey informed you from behind his professional and intimidating camera. The photographer praised you in the rapid movement to listen to his offer.

“Hey! Maddie! You should take a few photos. I need a pee break.” You didn’t wait for Maddie to respond in your rush to the somewhat rustic bathroom hut.

By the time you returned, Maddie was taking a couple pictures. Then you took some with Athena to have on the nursery walls and for Bobby to have a photo for his desk.

“Now one with all three of you.”

Present

“So a daredevil.” You stated unsurprised that the firefighter had a history of recklessness. You don’t go into firefighting without a taste for danger.

“The bruises and blood fit better than the awful bleached hair during my time in Peru.” Buck laughed, recalling the questionable choice in his fashion pre-firefighting. Sometimes he missed the people he encountered in his period of self-discovery.

“You didn’t wear puka sh-”

“I did. Bleached hair, puka shells and Hawaiian shirts were my staples during my bartending years. I fit in with the aesthetic of the bar I tended.”

“Buck!” You nearly gasped at his raw honesty. Buck didn’t hold back any answers to your questions, but you each strayed from the topic of family.

Talking about the tragic family history wasn’t a good idea on the first time regardless of the time you’d known each other.

“You’re telling me-” Buck halted as soon as he caught the flash of discomfort flicker over your beautiful features, “Are you okay?”

“She shifted. Been sitting on my blad-” You cut yourself off with a hiss of pain. Buck’s eyes widened at the pain taking over your features, “Oh, that hurt.”

Buck went straight into work mode, “Have you been in pain for long?”

“No. A few cramps here and there today, but my doctor said it was nothing to worry about.” You informed the experienced first responder resting level to your knees.

Buck didn’t want to say it, but he was sure that you’d gone into early labour. There was no indication your water had broken, but he kept over the last hour together. Every once in a while, you shifted or pressed a hand to your bump.

“Has your water broken?”

You shook your head, “No, but...oh... that’s not a cramp.”

With that statement out, you clenched your fingers tight on the edge of the table as pain rippled in your belly. A contraction that stole your breath momentarily. In your contraction, Buck had dialled 911. Buck recalled that sometimes a woman’s water doesn't break until right before the birth.

“We’re not getting that ice cream, are we?” You snorted upon being lifted onto the gurney. How fortunate or unfortunate you were to have the 118 right there.

Hen had taken a position at your feet to check on your lower body while Chimney took your vital signs. You honestly didn’t like the look Hen and Chimney shared with Buck.

“What is it?”

“We’re gonna need to deliver here.” Hen sighed, giving you the facts that terrified you. When you envisioned having the baby, it was in a medical centre. Not in a restaurant.

“My office is large and away from the crowd if you want. I can show you the way.” Sophie, the restaurant manager, offered already starting to lead the way. Sophie would never know how thankful you felt for being able to have privacy.

“Okay, Y/N, is it okay if I check how dilated you -.” Hen breathed with her hand, gently disappearing until the thin blanket Chimney procured from the stocked ambulance, “Y/N when I saw I want you to do that.”

Hen didn’t need to check your dilation when she could see the baby’s head already.

“I’m right here.” Buck cooed in your ear. He had held your hand as his coworkers did their jobs around you.

“This isn’t the way I envisioned you seeing my pu-”

“Push.” Hen urged, cutting off your almost vulgar language, but it eased the tension in the small restaurant office. You couldn’t even see Buck’s flustered reaction as you bore down with the contraction, “Good! Take a breath.”

“You’re a strong woman. It never ceases to amaze me the strength women have.” Buck spoke, keeping your e/c eyes on his blue ones. His hand raised to push a strand of your sweaty hair off your temple.

“Once more push!” Hen called out just in time with the last contraction. The feeling of the pressure between your legs popping was moan inducing.

Poppy was silent. Your entire body froze, yearning for the sweet sound of crying instead of the eerie silence. The world stood still as Chimney worked on your baby girl.

“Pulse is strong,” Chimney announced, keeping his attention on the task of clearing Poppy’s throat and nose. And that sweet sound of crying commenced, “Congratulations Y/N, you have a beautiful baby girl. Let’s get you to the hospital.”

Your father beat the ambulance to the nearest ER in pure anticipation at meeting his granddaughter Poppy Nash Gowan. He barely noticed as Buck stuck to your side like glue. Bobby waited outside the door as you got checked over in the room.

“Quite the first date.” You mused towards Buck, who hovered in awe over the life form you had carried for nine months. You’d been pregnant for three quarters of an entire year to his fascination. 

“All my meaningful relationships started with a medical emergency.” Buck finally looked up at you. He’d kept Poppy company in the bassinet while you delivered the afterbirth upon entering the hospital.

“Seriously?”

“Had a tracheostomy on Valentine’s Day with Abby, an earthquake with Ali and a newscaster in a crashed helicopter.” Buck listed off. He hadn’t even noticed scooping the newborn into his arms until he’d sat in the chair by your bed, “Why not add a sudden labour and delivery.”

“He would have liked you.”

The sentence came out of absolutely nowhere. Almost like something had ripped it out of your vocal cords. At the look of confusion, you elaborated.

“Lucas. He would have liked you. I think if it is possible, he might have pushed me into meeting you. I’ll still need to take it slow, but I’d like to give this a shot.”

That was all Buck needed to lean in closer to kiss you—the first of many kisses.

Some might disagree on how quick your relationship with Buck developed, but they didn’t know yours at all. It was natural with the firefighter who stepped into the role of father figure for a growing Poppy. By the time Poppy was one, you’d moved into a house not far from your father’s place with Buck. By the time Poppy was three, a pretty ring had sat on your finger. By five, the young girl had a baby brother. 

“Your parents spoil Poppy.”

“You say that like you didn’t crawl into her crib during her afternoon naps.” You deadpanned towards your husband. Buck had the nerve to sheepishly grin, “You give in each time she says ‘pwetty pwease’ for a cookie.”

“It’s a crime to make her sad!” Buck defended himself, but a grin of amusement threatened his act, “Besides, you crack each time too!”

“Mhm. Just wait until Theo can talk.” You pressed a kiss to the sleeping infant strapped into the baby carrier. Theodore Robert Buckley could fall asleep in a thunderstorm if he was in Buck’s arms.

“Oh! Maddie wants to have Poppy over for a play date. Madster’s been begging for her cousin to have a sleepover.”

Maddie and Chimney’s daughter was only a few months younger than your daughter, but the two were thick as thieves. Buck had referred to the Han daughter as Madster with how similar her mannerisms were to her mother.

“Think they’d take the rascal?”

“Is this code for you wanting to have another?” Buck questioned with a twinkle of mischief in his blue eyes. The same blue Theo had inherited along with a birthmark like Buck’s on his bicep.

“I-” You choked, blinking furiously, “Evan, I pushed Theo out of my body barely three months ago!”

Buck inconspicuously winked in response with the sudden scream of excitement coming from Poppy. The rambunctious five-year-old ploughed into Buck’s legs full force. Falling into the practised ease, you’d unstrapped Theo from Buck’s chest and promptly had his tiny body stolen into his grandpa’s arms.

“There’s my boy.” Bobby cooed to the sleep drunk tiny infant. The little baby is crowded by his Gram Athena and Aunt May, “Gonna have to get you a Minnesota Wilds jersey.”

“Hell no. That boy is LA born and bred. He’ll be wearing a Kings jersey like the civilized.” Michael announced with the sudden arrival of Theo and Poppy’s Uncle Harry.

“Mommy? When are we going to Stralia?” Poppy inquired from right beside your leg. Her tiny handheld is the giant one of her dad.

“In a few weeks. Are you excited to see the mommy’s old friends again?”

“Hm. Can we see Dada?”

Buck may be Poppy’s father, but he’d never let Poppy go without knowing she had two fathers in all. Her first one waiting to meet here decades from the time she was born and solely referenced Lucas as Dada. Buck was grateful for the man who brought Poppy into existence; the little green-eyed tot Buck could never regret. Unlike Buck’s parents keeping his older brother’s existence a secret, the firefighter refused to follow in their footsteps. He’d continue to shower the late Lucas in gratitude and respect. He refused to make the same mistakes as Phillip and Margaret Buckley.

“Of course. C’mon Poppy, time to say goodbye.” Buck guided the little girl to the extended family showering her little brother with love. The little girl was quickly swung into Bobby’s arms, and Athena cooing at your infant son.

Changes. The six-letter word doesn’t have to be terrifying. It can be breathtaking, memorable and beautiful to experience. 

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[awindylife-writes]

Sick

Relationships: 10th Doctor x reader (Not an established relationship)

Summary: the Doctor and you find yourselves on a spaceship in desparate need of repair and you are determined to help the crew (Kaisa, Lincoln and Bressa), but then the ship also gets highjacked. And on top of that, you fall sick.

Warnings: you're in mortal danger but that's it

You were standing by the big metal desk in the middle of the room, reading the numbers to Kaisa so he could type them in.

The digits kept swimming in your vision. They were blurry, everything was blurry, but they also kept moving. And when did it get so hot? You wiped the sweat from your forehead while trying to breathe deeply. You knew that if you looked up from the pad, the room would be spinning. The worst part was the tiredness. It coiled through your limbs and made them so heavy you could hardly move them. The effort to keep connecting letters and sounds, keep connecting thoughts hurt.

You closed your eyes for a second and the ship tilted so far you lost your balance. You stumbled back, eyes flying open and arms trying to reach out for something to hold onto.

Suddenly there were strong hands on your shoulder and the small of your back, steadying you. You looked up and recognized the dark orange skin and curly brown hair that was greying at the edges. Kaisa had caught you.

"Are you alright?" his gruff voice came to you.

"Yeah, yeah l'm okay." That sounded weak even to your own ears. "The ship just tilted."

"The ship's fine, love," he answered in confusion. You could see furrowed eyebrows, and then his dark golden eyes. You couldn't make out the wrinkles around them, or the lines on his forehead. Everything was blurry.

He put one hand around you to hold you up, then felt your forehead with the other. It was blessedly cold and you leaned into it with a sigh. "I think humans aren't supposed to be this hot," his worried voice came then.

You could hear Lincoln and Bressa turn around and step closer. You would have cracked a joke about drinks first if you weren't about to ask to sit down from exhastion. But you all had a job to do.

"I'm okay," you tried to reassure him. "Let's just get back to-" As you stepped away from Kaisa to shake his hands off, the ground rushed up and you barely caught yourself on the table. His arms were back, supporting you, before you could fall further. Shit.

"You're sick," Kaisa confirmed with a voice full of worry. He gently pulled you from the table and towards the wall. "Here, sit down," he told you softly and manouvered you to a stack of crates. He helped you sit on one and you rested your head on the taller pile.

"Thanks," you breathed gratefully and closed your eyes.This is nice.

On the other side of the room you could just hear Bressa order Lincoln, "Go get the Doctor. Tell him y/n's sick." Her voice was grave.

~

The Doctor had just recalibrated the fiberlinks of the navicomputer and was well on his way of taking apart the integral protonic bond when Lincoln reached him. The Doctor didn't even pull his head out of the ship's innards, much less stood up. "What is it?" He didn't have time for this.

"Your friend," the young man's distressed voice came. "She's sick."

That made worry explode in his chest. Ice spread through his veins as he hurriedly pulled himself out of the wiring. He hit his head on the way but that didn't matter, not when y/n was-

"What did you say?" the Doctor demanded in a low voice, eyes scanning the Tirellian crewmate.

"Y/n is sick." The Doctor marked every blink, every twitch, every line. He did not like the worried frown on Lincoln's face. He had gotten his answer.

The Doctor put the sonic back in his inner pocket and demanded, "Where is she?", voice forcibly calm but unrelenting. He picked up his coat as the young man turned to show the way, and off they went.

~

When your eyes were closed, you could almost pretend you were fine, but the fever, the heat in your skin was killing you. The box on your cheek and forehead had warmed up and provided no more relief.

You could feel even the darkness around you spin if you tried to think.

~

The Doctor ran into the room after Lincoln, trench coat billowing around him.

"Where is she?" he demanded in worry with his gaze searching the room.

"Over here." Kaisa stood up from behind the large metal table and pointed at the stack of crates beside the wall. He stepped back towards the others as the Doctor came to kneel before you with his coat scraping the floor. His hands hovered just inches above your skin.

"Y/n," he breathed quietly while looking you over. His hand settled on your arm. Scarlet cheeks, sweat - fever, eyes closed, leaning on the crate - exhausti-

You tiredly opened your eyes but you didn't lift your head. "Doct'r." The regret was already in your voice. "'M sorry. I should've-" Should have known the signs, should have slept more, should have eaten-

"You have nothing to be sorry for," he murmured softly, shaking his head. He rubbed your arm, his expression gentle and reassuring.

He took your hand and found your pulse point, which made butterflies flutter in your stomack despite the sickness. Then he lifted his other hand to your cheek. It was cold so you leaned into it, your eyes closing in content. You breathed deeply but it seemed like there was never enough air.

"You've definitely got a fever, about 39 degrees," he continued in that same soft tone. "And your heart is speeding up. How're you feeling?"

"Evr'thin's spinnin'," you told him tiredly, words a bit slurred. You tried to remember, but the things you were trying to describe made it hard to do that. "Couldn't stand up, Kaisa caught me. Couldn'read anymore, evr'thing was blurry'n moving. My head hurts, my eyes hurt, ever'thing hurts. An'l'm tired," you sighed. "I wanna go t'sleep."

"You will, l promise you will, but you need medicine first," he told you gently yet firmly. "It's the virus Tem, from Polon. We were there about four days ago, it's quite common for the planet, but it's dangerous." His brown eyes were full of worry. "If it's left untreated, as yours was, it can be deadly." He left the sentence hang in the silence after it.

You tried to shake your head but the motion caused more pain and you stopped. "So l'll get the meds and ll'l be fine," you told him tiredly. It didn't seem like much of a problem. You faced death on a daily basis, so what was a little virus?

"What do we do?" Kaisa stepped closer and looked down at the two of you, eyebrows furrowed in worry and hands crossed in front of his chest.

The Doctor moved closer and took you by the shoulders. "C'm on." He smiled encouragingly as he gently helped you stand up. You didn't like it, but the solution to this situation probably required moving.

You leaned against him and put your head on his shoulder as he helped you stay upright. The spinning did not help your stomack.

"Polonians have a vaccine, but it's far too late for that. You though, you three come from Kristella, is that right?" the Doctor looked around the room.

"Yeah," Kaisa nodded.

"So you receaved the whole med package there, including the VC five-six-o-nine."

"Yes."

"Good," he nodded, "bless the Kristellan med care. Your immune system knows the virus so you're not in danger. But you," he looked down at you, gritting his teeth, "are."

Well, that was a bit obvious.

He looked back up at Kaisa. "I want you to get her to the med bay. Give her Triskel two point three with a lot of water, she needs to stay hydrated, and then two shots of Amino when that's down, got it?"

"Yes," the large sailor nodded and stepped closer to take you. "And don't 'Got it' me, young man."

The Doctor opened his mouth to explain the whole Time Lord age thing when-

"I don't wanna go," you mumbled into his chest, pressing yourself closer. The room was spinning, you couldn't see well and you could barely stand. The thought of leaving him (he meant safe and good and you needed him) on this ship where anything could happen to you or him (who would look after him if not you?) made you want to sob.

He pulled away enough to look at you but still hold you. His eyes were soft. "I know," he told you gently and then frowned at the thought of letting you go, "l don't like this either." Every instinct in him flared against leaving you while you were sick and in need of him. He was Gallifreyan, and he protected what was his, even if you didn't know. "But you need medicine, and they need help rewiring the ship," he put it plainly. "I have to stay, and you have to go."

You nodded even though it hurt. He pulled you closer and for a moment, you just held each other.

"Stay safe," you said into his shoulder, almost an order. "Not a hair out of place, you hear me?"

You could feel him smile at the familiar tone. "Yes, ma'am."

It was time to go. You slowly let go of the Doctor as Kaisa came closer. He slung a hand around your waist while you put yours around his shoulders. It worked well, you could stay upright and move at the same time.

Then the whole ship shook like it was being torn apart and you were thrown against the table while Lincoln yelled in surprise. The Doctor and Kaisa kept you stable and unharmed between them, but the room looked like it had survived an earthquake.

"Are you alright?" The Doctor was franctically looking you over for injuries.

"What the hell was that?" demanded Bressa.

~

Kaisa didn't know what to do. You and him were locked in one of the main storage rooms, and they hadn't even let you get medicine. The large Risonians, two out of six who had highjacked the ship, simply came into the med bay and dragged you out before he could find anything to help you. You hadn't even gotten water.

All he could do was put his jacket under your head when you couldn't sit up anymore and hold your hand as you slipped into a restless sleep.

Then he noticed the computer log in the corner behind the crates. He could rewire it, send an altering pulse through the system... He looked at you as your head turned from one side to the other as you gasped for breath, mumbling nonsense in your sleep. Your fever was rising.

"Right then, love. I'm going to get help."

~

When the Doctor noticed Kaisa's message beeping under the log, he'd been momentarily confused. He'd made it very clear to the Risonians that you needed medicine and that he would do anything to make sure you got it, so why would they-

A second later, a pair of the hijacking crew came marching into the room with guns drawn. The Commander was as shocked as him when two of her people turned against her.

This was bad.

~

The Doctor walked into the storage room with his hands behind his head, with Bressa and Lincoln behind him. What remained of the Risonian crew had been locked into a separate room, to keep you all separated. His eyes immediately scanned the space for you.

When he turned the corner behind a high stack of crates, his hearts lurched. You were unconscious, lying on the floor with Kaisa holding your hand.

The Doctor was by your side in a second. Your skin was pale, but your cheeks were scarlet and your forehead glistened with sweat. You were mumbling in your sleep, your breaths laboured. Your head was turning restlessly in the throes of a fever dream. He took your warm hand and held it tightly.

"She was asking for you," Kaisa told him softly, eyes still trained on your face.

"What?" The Doctor's gaze flew to the larger man in confusion.

Kaisa looked up at him, "She was asking for you." He searched his eyes, for what, the Doctor didn't know. "Even after she couldn't answer me anymore, she kept asking for you in her sleep."

The Doctor felt like a hand had squeezed his hearts. It happened again, he did it again, you were in danger and it was his fault. He looked down at your closed eyes and scarlet cheeks. You were helpless, you needed him, and he couldn't do anything.

He brought your hand to his cheek and held it there with his palm as he closed his eyes. He needed you to live, he needed you to be alright. You had to be.

"Doct'r," your voice was barely a whisper.

His eyes flew open and he stared down at your still sleeping form. You turned your head to the side and, "Doct'r," again his name.

It lit a blazing fire in his chest. That was it. That was it, he was getting you out. He was getting all of you out because that was what he was going to do and the universe would bloody listen. He was the Doctor, and you were his. He was not losing you, not ever.

They'd taken the sonic but he was, for all intents and purposes, in a supply closet. Time to find out exactly which supplies he had.

[the-iceni-bitch]

Too Precious

Pairing: Ransom Drysdale x fem!Reader (OTP)

Words: 1.2k

Summary: Your dog hates the Fourth of July, and Ransom is worried about him.

Warnings: explicit language, extremely, upsettingly soft and fluffy Ransom (like, I honestly hate myself for coming up with this), major fluff

A/N: Welp, this is a hard left turn from the filthy shit I’ve been churning out but it popped in my head and took me less than an hour to write. I don’t know why I’ve made these two so soft, it’s killing me in the best way, so now you all have to suffer with me.

I no longer do taglists, so if you want to stay up to date on all the latest filth, follow my side blog @the-iceni-library and turn on notifications!

You frowned lightly when Ransom got up for the third time in an hour, making you pause the movie again as he claimed he was going to the bathroom.

He’d been acting weird all night. You weren’t totally sure what was going on with him, the only thing that was different about tonight was that the occasional firework was going off as people prepared for the Fourth. Actually, you realized that every time an explosion occurred he made some excuse to leave the room for a few minutes.

His voice drifted to the living room from the hall, and even though you couldn’t make out what he was saying his tone was warm and reassuring. You let out a soft sigh when you rose to your feet to find out what he was up to, an inkling already niggling your brain as you made your way to the laundry room.

“Hey bubba, it’s ok.” Yep, he was doing exactly what you thought. “Don’t worry, bud, it’s just some noise.”

It had taken you a bit, but you were slowly starting to accept that your dog might like your boyfriend more than you. And the sight of him kneeling next to the big furball while he shook with anxiety was really cementing that fact.

“Ran.” He jolted when you spoke his name, giving you a slightly sheepish look but keeping his hand on Fionn’s head to give him reassuring ear rubs. “Baby, I told you, you’ve gotta act like everything is normal or it just reaffirms that he should be scared.”

“Honey, I don’t think I can do it.” God, both of them were giving you puppy eyes now, it was ridiculous. “He looks so terrified.”

“Sweetie, I promise the meds I gave him help with the stress, and having a safe space to go to is really helpful too.” You’d set up a nice little cubby for him to hide in when the noise got to be too much, and he was curled up in it now. “He’ll be ok if we just let him be, he might even wander out on his own eventually. C’mon, let’s go watch the movie.”

Ransom let you drag him to his feet reluctantly, giving the dog a forlorn look while you led him out of the room. He settled into the couch ok, resting his head against your chest and letting you curl your body around him with a deep sigh. Every time he heard an explosion, though, you could feel him tense up with a little start. Even your fingers running through his hair couldn’t help him relax, his eyes darting furtively to the hallway while he chewed on his lips with worry.

You had to put up with this type of shit for the whole week. Ransom refused to go to sleep until the fireworks had completely stopped and he could do a final check in on the dog to coax him up to your bedroom. As annoying as it was, it was also stupidly adorable. He’d almost refused to go to the massive fireworks display his family went to each year on the Third until you assured him your friend Becca was going to take amazing care of him, and that your old neighborhood barely had any fireworks so there was nothing to worry about.

Then the Fourth hit and the field near your house was apparently declared a designated war zone. Your poor dog was a cowering mess almost as soon as the sun went down, and even with the drugs and all the other anti-anxiety precautions you took, he was still shaking like a leaf in his little cubby. Ransom was almost as big of a mess, pacing around the house and wringing his hands while he tried to keep himself calm for the sake of your sweet pooch. 

“Ransom, please come to bed.” It was almost midnight, but there were still occasional explosions happening outside that made him jump. “This happens every year and I promise, he’s always fine.”

“I’m just gonna hang out for a little longer, baby.” He’d finally sat on the couch and was sipping on a beer, but the way his knee was bouncing let you know he was still freaking out a bit. “I’ll be up soon, ok?”

You just sighed deeply as you headed back up the stairs, rubbing a hand over your face and yawning while you made your way to your inviting mattress. Even with the intermittent noise, you quickly submitted to the pull of exhaustion, groaning with disappointment at the empty half of the bed next to you before your eyes drifted closed. 

Something woke you up around four hours later, though you weren’t sure what. You huffed when you noticed Ran’s side of the bed was still empty, getting out of the bed and wobbling on your sleepy legs as you determined to find out where exactly your stupidly soft boyfriend had fallen asleep.

He wasn’t on the couch when you got downstairs, and that made you frown. You had been certain he had passed out there while he waited for the fireworks to stop. The search of the guest bedroom also yielded no results, and you considered yelling to find him before something occurred to you.

As soon as you walked into the laundry room your chest started to ache. Your asshole boyfriend had crawled into the cubby you had set up for Fionn, and apparently fallen asleep with the dog sprawled over his chest. This was too precious for you, the man was supposed to let you get up all your pent up meanness, not make it feel like your ovaries were about to explode while your heart fluttered wildly. You knelt beside the cubby and crawled on top of them, pressing your lips to Ransom’s forehead and shaking him softly until his eyes fluttered open.

“Hey baby.” You grinned at him when his eyes met yours, brushing his hair out of his face while he blinked at you in confusion. “What’re you doing in here?”

“I felt bad leaving him by himself, so I thought I’d lay next to him until things calmed down.” He winced when he sat up, the dog wagging his tail when he woke up and saw the two of you there. “Guess I fell asleep.”

“Ok, well let’s all go upstairs to bed, hmm?” You pulled him to his feet and helped him straighten out when he stumbled a little bit, Fionn stretching then following after the two of you as you headed up the stairs. “Don’t think sleeping on the laundry room floor is gonna be the best thing for your neck.”

He just grunted softly and started stripping out of his clothes once you reached the master suite, watchin you and Fionn crawl into the bed with a small smile. You purred happily when he finally joined you, the two of you wrapping around each other while the dog curled up at your feet in a picture of domestic bliss that you couldn’t believe didn’t piss you off more.